Adoption Krahnicles

Immigration Miracle

2010-04-08T13:18:00.002-07:00

We changed Marie's name from Asnakech to Marie Asnakech after we adopted her. Unfortunately I did this AFTER applying for her citizenship card which was my bad. So, we had one set of documentation that had one name and another that had the other name. Under normal circumstances this would be fine, however since we are crossing many borders soon with our big move to Tanzania, I thought it would make life way simpler to have just one name for the child that looks nothing like her parents (especially travelling in countries where adoption is an unheard of concept). I called immigration and asked how long this would take. I was told that it would be 10 months to a year... not good news since we were leaving in 8. I asked if they could expidite the process and was told that unless someone was dying, there was no way... The trouble is that I had to send back her first immigration card and run the risk of having none. GULP. I wrote a letter and with great treppidition put that and the card in the mail. A month and a half later, I had the new card in my hands with the correct information!!!! The funny part is that two days later I received a letter from CIC stating that they had received my application and would process it in the next ten months! I laughed with tears of relief streaming down my face. I really think they have no idea what they put us through, but am grateful none the less for Marie's paperwork to FINALLY all be in order. :-)

Marie and Marie

2010-01-21T17:12:00.004-08:00

Last spring we travelled to Calgary because we knew that my Oma was dying. I wanted to see her one more time and wanted the kids to see her one more time. Marie is named after Oma and Oma cared very much for Marie. I didn't realise how special it was to her that Marie was named after her until after the fact. Oma told me, that she was sad to not be able to see her grow up.

I was so glad that the kids each got to sit on her knee and say goodbye. The boys understood. They hugged her and kissed her and when I told Ryan it was time to say goodbye, he said "It's not goodbye mommy... we'll see eachother in heaven"... So they said their see-you-latters. It was a special easter. Today on face book I came across these pictures that my aunt had taken. I miss Oma, but at least I have little Marie to hold onto.

Canadian Citizenship DONE

2009-11-12T15:40:00.005-08:00

Well we FINALLY got Marie's Canadian Citizenship done! Here she is holding her card: Part of what took so long was that she would not sit still to have her picture taken at least not with the standards they had... eyes open, facing forward, mouth closed, no smile etc etc. It took us three hours during 3 different sessions to get this done... I tried everything I could think of...

Some kids were just not made to sit still. Now we have to get her passport done...

A couple more pics

2009-06-25T08:55:00.006-07:00

Thanks to our friend S for taking the pics! We were well overdue for having a family photos again.

Update

2009-06-24T13:46:00.001-07:00

Well we past the one year mark and had Marie's 2nd birthday this spring. Time is flying by and our little girl is growing up before our very eyes. Not sure if anyone is still reading, but if you are, I thought you might enjoy a photo update of our munchkins.

Marie the computer geek

2008-11-28T12:40:00.002-08:00

Well Marie takes after dad I guess. She loves to press the buttons on the keyboard... and sometimes if you aren't paying enough attention, right in the middle of an important document... the power switch.

Ucluelet

2008-11-25T08:43:00.012-08:00

We were having difficulty finding time to just be together without having an agenda. So at the last minute we decided to take the kids to Ucluelet for the weekend. For those who don't know Ucluelet is on Vancouver Island's west coast near Tofino. We had an amazing weekend. The weather was fantastic and so were the kids. We rented a cabin on the beach and just enjoyed being a family. The kids were very impressed with giant waves and the vast expanses of beach. Paul and Ryan claimed squatters rights in a driftwood fort and enjoyed playing their morning away making "additions". Marie stomped and splashed in every single puddle she could find including the great puddle called the pacific. I was very glad to have packed the mud pants for all five of us :-). The kids were excellent even on the four + hour drive and we have resolved to do this kind of thing a little more often.

The Change over 8 months

2008-11-20T12:29:00.004-08:00

This is Marie the first day we met her...

Nervous and shy, Daddy had to whisper reassurances to her.

And this is our Marie today:

Her favorite thing in the world is to be squished in a hug between her parents. To the point that Jeremy can't hug me without feeling a little tug at the pant leg. If that doesn't yeild results quickly enough, she follows up with emphatic sounds and trying simultaneously pull herself up/climb our legs. :-)

A Thanksgiving Update

2008-10-29T09:53:00.004-07:00

Well school is in full swing and we are thankfully settled into a routine. This Thanksgiving we went to my Aunt and Uncles for dinner. Mom and Dad Devin and Erin, and S and R were also there. We had a wonderful day. I was snuggling with Marie on the couch as she slept and tears began to stream down my face. I was remembering sitting in the very same spot last year with a massive gapping hole in my heart. Last year at Thanksgiving, I knew that we were weeks away from a proposal but had been so long all ready I felt like it might still be years. Don't get me wrong, I was grateful for my boys and my amazing husband, but I also knew that there was a little girl out there who needed me and who didn't even know I existed yet and if the truth is told, I needed her as well. So, this year when people came by and offered to hold her for a while, or suggested that I could lay her down in the other room, I just smiled and held on a little tighter to my sweet little bundle. Yep. This year I have lots to be thankful for.

Dinner was also very yummy!

2008-09-21T12:57:00.000-07:00

A busy busy summer

2008-08-14T10:31:00.007-07:00

Well July was insanely crazy. We decided to take out a loan to finish the reno's. We were really feeling like our family life was suffering because all of our spare time was being taken up renovating. To that end we hired my uncle and his partner to come in and do the following:

Replace the kitchen (we bought used cabinets for $600)
Take out the chimney that was in the middle of the boys room and re-do the room
Move the entry from the side of the house to the front and build a covered deck in front of it.
Make the mud room into a dining room ( I know that sounds odd, but it's adjacent to the kitchen and it works).
Add a wall to divide the living room from the new entry and build a hall closet.

All of the flooring and finishing work was to be done by Jeremy and I because of the tight budget.

The last week of june, my Mom let us stay with her. Then we took off to alberta for a couple of weeks. When we got home, Jeremy and I helped for a week while mom watched the kids (thanks mom) and at the end of July we finally moved home. At the beginning of August Jeremy had to go back to work and things are still not done, but they are liveable. I can't believe there are only a couple of weeks of summer left before the craziness of school begins again. SIGH.

We still have to put cupboard doors on the kitchen (I have to sand and paint them). This is becoming a priority though as Marie frequently helps herself and empties the pots and pans etc. I am always coming into the kitchen to find odd things on the floor!

Also, we still have flooring to do in the kitchen/ entry and some painting on the new deck. We have a new office that needs finishing as well. I am thinking that these projects will have to wait for the winter months though.... so much for having more family time...

We did enjoy our time in Alberta though. We drove through the night to Grande Prarie so that the kids could sleep. This was the first time Marie met Jeremy's family. It was nice to visit with them, but a bit crazy. There are now 9 grandkids (soon to be 10!) and 8 of them are 5 years and under, 7 are boys! It was hectic but lovely.

We then drove down to Wetaskwin for Jeremy's cousin's wedding, where we got to introduce Marie to more of Jeremy's extended family. We stayed a couple of days and this was truly the highlight of the trip for the boys because there were puppies and quads on the farm! After that we made our way to Calgary where we had a fantastic visit with our good friends Debbie and Einar and visited Drumhellar and the zoo. Then we made our way to High River where we had a couple of days with My Oma and Opa. Marie is named after my Oma. It was really good to see them again. We then made the epic drive (this time during the day, over a couple days) home.

Marie Update

2008-06-22T09:31:00.003-07:00

Life is humming along and so is Marie's development. She is growing quickly and last week she learned to walk. I have never seen a kid go from crawling to walking so quickly. The day she took her first steps, she worked her way up to 9 steps. A week later she is walking 1/2 the time and crawling the other. I am going to miss her crawl... on her feet and hands (no knees) with her little bum up in the air. However, my arms are grateful as she is still heavy! Here is Marie baffed out on the couch after a busy day of walking! As if june isn't busy enough we have started our massive reno. The boys room upstairs, new roof, new entrance, and the kitchen... so check back for before and after pics coming sometime...

Marie's first birthday

2008-05-30T17:00:00.023-07:00

First of all, a big thank you to everyone who was able to make it out for Marie's party on the long weekend! We really appreciated your company while we celebrated this milestone. How many milestones can you pack into two months?

Here are a few:

Solid food:

learning to crawl:

learning to stand:
:

learning to love the bath:
:

Learning to walk holding my hands and "table walk":

She has even mastered going up the stairs much to my dismay and her delight. It feels like almost over night Marie has turned into a little adventurer. In one very long day (for me), she tipped over 2 glasses of juice (left on the table by the boys), and one cup of (thankfully cold) coffee. She also discovered the joys of swishing your hands in the toilet (YUCK) and got her fingers stuck in a drawer. I was glad when she was safely asleep. Since then, I have gotten used to having a little mischief making toddler around again and it is delightful watching her grow accustomed to her new role in our family and her surroundings. She now expresses excitement and delight as well as being able to (loudly) assert herself when things are not quite to her liking.

Here are some of the pictures from her party. We filled the trampoline full of balloons for the bigger kids and the baby pool full of balls for the smaller ones. She had a ball... but thought very little of the cake

Marie's First Birthday

2008-05-16T09:22:00.002-07:00

If you know us and are in the area you are invited! Marie is having her first birthday party this weekend. We have felt really supported by our community in the adoption process and would really like to make her party a community event. So we are having an open house on sunday, potluck style. Feel free to drop by anytime after 1ish. We'd love to see you even for just a couple of minutes :-)

April 28th

2008-04-28T08:35:00.009-07:00

The kids are doing well. This last weekend we had Auntie Nina's birthday party and Daddy's birthday as well so it was a pretty busy weekend. Oma and Opa are here from Alberta so Marie got to meet them which is special. Marie is named after Oma, so we had two Marie's in the house!

Everyone seems to be settling in and doing fine. Everyone but me. I seem to be in a bit of a funk. I am thrilled with Marie and her progress. I love spending time with her and with the boys. Ryan is becoming a super helper and Paul is really developing a hilarious sense of humour. Nothing is particularily wrong, I just can't seem to get a handle on things. Anyway, enough complaining.

Here are some pictures from this weekend.

Marie getting to know Oma and Opa and Daddy blowing out his candles with help:

Since we've been home

2008-04-10T11:50:00.003-07:00

I don't seem to be able to get around to blogging lately... something about chasing after 3 kids...

I did want to do an update on Marie though. She is doing fantastic. She has made a nearly seemless adjustment to life here in Canada with us. It took us a little while to get her used to being immersed in water for bath time and a few days to adjust to PST time. Other than that though, she has been doing awesome. We are so proud of her. She cries very rarely and is mostly found giggling and cooing to her brothers. In the month since we took custody of her she has learned to eat solid food (voraciously), and has learned to crawl. She also says DA DA DA and MUM MUM MUM. She knows who we are and she prefers us to all others (me especially). She recognizes her brothers and misses them when they are gone. She waves when someone waves at her and has learned to clap her hands. Her health is good, today we had her hearing checked and it is perfect. If she is crying, she is calmed almost immediately by being picked up. She still gets up once a night which we are not fond of, but hey, no one is perfect (she is close though!). In the last week she has began to express her preferences a little more vocally which we are glad to see as it means she is getting more and more comfortable. Things have been going so well that I have actually even left her for a couple of hours with my mom and my sister, which is something I didn't think I would be doing for months. She got a little clingy the week after Jeremy went back to work, but that seems to have passed and I think we have a general routine that is working for us.

It seems though, that I can't leave well enough alone and we have embarked on another reno project... We are finishing the entry way. I also got 12 yards of dirt delivered to the back yard to spread out and begin a veggie garden. Jeremy just shakes his head. I am glad he puts up with me :-)

March 12th

2008-03-28T20:01:00.007-07:00

Today, Jeremy went to the German Embassy to get Marie's transit visa. I went with the other mom's (and one brave dad) to the hospital to get all the kids checked out for ear infections before the trip home. It was quite the experience. It cost $4 to see the doctor and apparently it was a pretty swanky clinic that the average Ethiopian would be turned away from. It was kind of sad, before I realised what was happening, we were given preferential treatment. We were seen before everyone in the waiting room because we were foreigners. At one point, we had to go and wait in another waiting area, and the nurse kicked other people who were waiting off the seats so we could sit. I tried to tell her that it was not required, but she wouldn't listen to me. It was quite unfortunate. The Dr saw Marie and he gave her a clean bill of health in terms of her ears. So hopefully on the way home we won't have any screaming. That was all I wanted to get checked. I figure that the rest can wait until home. Some other families had their kids checked for other things and so we had to wait for some tests to come back and prescriptions to be filled. The kids all did really well, some of them cried in the exam room but even so, it was a pretty frazzling experience. I think we were glad we did it though as a couple of the kids did actually have ear infections. We were glad to get back to the guest house and get lunch.

In the afternoon we went to Gelgela orphanage. Marie spent a day there before being taken to the CAFAC foster home. I hadn't had a chance yet to go out and buy soccer balls, so I had to dig into the supplies that I brought from home as I did not want to go empty handed. I brought one soccer ball of really nice quality, and some clothes and hats for older children. I also brought a few school supplies. We were not allowed to take photos of the children which was disappointing. I did take a picture of these cribs though because you could not see the kids in them. There were four kids in these two cribs. It was really sad, one of the babies looked really really sick and small... to the point where I was not sure if he was going to make it. The kids were really ragged and there were no toys anywhere in sight. Many of the kids did not have shoes and the shoes that were there were falling apart. Outside in the court yard there was a merry go round and a swing set that had the swings wrapped around the top bar... aparently they were not for use. At first I did not know what to do. After a few awkward moments with the kids, I went to the swingset and unwrapped a swing... immediately there was a swarm of kids. I made them all line up so it was fair. Then one by one I pushed each child for a few minutes. I was very greatful I had learned to count to five in amharic, because I would count to three and then give each child an under duck. Then tickle them a little on the swing as I pushed them. After a couple of times, all the kids in the line began chanting one two three. You could hear a chorus of "and, oolet, soust!" It was very cute. I must have pushed at least thirty or fourty kids before I started getting repeat kids. At that point my arms gave out and another parent took over for me. Someone else brought balloons along with us and this was also a big hit. The kids thought blowing them up then letting them whiz through the air was really funny. The soccer ball was also a big hit. There was not enough room for a game so instead we played volleyball. The kids kicked our buts! I was very glad we went and the kids gave me a big complement by asking me to return the next day. One of the other families took down a list of things that the orphanage needs and they plan to go shopping for the things later in the week.

March 11

2008-03-28T19:54:00.002-07:00

Today is Gotcha day for all the other families. We are so glad we didn't have to wait this long to get Marie! While all the other families went to collect their kids, Jeremy and I went shopping at Church Hill Market. This is essentially where all the tourists go to get touristy kind of stuff. We bought a traditional dress for me, and one for Marie, as well as some banana leaf pictures and some scarves. I kind of wanted to look around and see what all is available before I bought. I was surprised at the market, as I thought we would really be accosted and pressed to buy. Proprieters invite you into their stalls/stores and they will show you items, but it is fairly low pressure. You don't feel a lot of pressure and people aren't shouting at you from all directions. All in all it was a pretty good experience. I will post some pictures of some of the items we bought, but I have to take the pictures first ;-)

March 10th

2008-03-28T19:46:00.002-07:00

March tenth we met the other families and figured out the rest of the schedule for the trips. Up till now we have pretty much had a driver all to ourselves. Now we will have to schedule our outings around the other families. Today, everyone else went to meet their children. We anticipated that they would be home around noon, but the whole afternoon went by before they were back. We had to keep ourselves busy at the guest house and surrounding area. By mid afternoon we were pretty bored. In the evening, we went to celebrate out at the crown hotel. There was traditional dancing from different areas of Ethiopia. I wish I had some pictures of it, but I didn't pack our stuff and so we ended up with neither video camera nor still camera along with us. Marie did amazing. She slept through dinner, then happily sat on my lap and watched till around 10 pm when we left. I would have liked to stay and see the rest but everyone else was still really really jet lagged and wanted to get some rest before they took custody of the kids.

March 9th

2008-03-28T16:15:00.003-07:00

This afternoon, we met another family who came to Ethiopia a little early. Jeremy went out for dinner with them (again to the Indian restaurant) while I rested. Tonight all the other families arrive and I am excited to meet them. We have had contact via email, but we are looking forward to meeting in person and watching them meet their own children and becoming families.

We tried to give Marie a bath today and we found out that she has lungs and she knows how to use them. I am going to have to find out what they do to bathe the kids at the foster home because sticking her in a tub of water obviously wasn't it! She screamed so loud, I had pity on her and took her out and just gave her a sponge bath. Luckily, she calms down right away when we pick her up so the worst thing that happened was that she got my shirt all wet.

March 8th (Written by Jeremy)

2008-03-24T15:19:00.006-07:00

We've had one complete day with Marie now. It's quite remarkable how well things have gone so far. We were prepared for a lot of crying, not being able to console her, a lack of sleep, the whole gammit. As it is, she seems to have adjusted to us well and is a cheerful little soul. If she cries, picking her up and holding her calms her down immediately. She was a bit of trouble to settle down last night because she kept waking up. After a while though she went to bed and slept the whole night through. She woke up very cheerful and has remained so for most of the day. Are we going to pay for this later in life? We visited the Merkato today with a couple from Edmonton. I think we spent more time looking for parking than actually shopping. Ketema our driver, strongly warned us about pickpockets and other theives. After a relatively short visit to a few shops we headed out. I must say I prefer Church Hill Rd Market. It is smaller, easier to park and has more variety in a small area. It caters mainly to tourists. If we were living here, I am sure we would find the Merkato useful though. The Merkato is broken into areas by contents like "shoes and purses", and "automotive" etc. This is great if you are looking for a particular item, but is lousy if you are just browsing. Apparently you can get anything at the Mercato from false teeth to donkeys. After dropping the other family at the Sheraton for swimming, we went to the Haile Selese Museum in Addis Ababa University. We learned a fair bit more about different cultures within this amazing country. Leah is finishing a Suduku puzzle and we only have one pen, so that's it for my writting for now. Leah: This is a list of the things we know about Marie so far: She cries when we put her down but calms down immediately when picked up. She prefers to sleep on her tummy She likes the snuggly She likes to cuddle She likes juice from a cup She has two teeth She is too busy to get dressed She babbles to herself in the morning, especially if you put her in front of the mirror. She has birth marks on her back. She is perfect.

Friday March 7th -- Gotcha day

2008-03-22T10:51:00.014-07:00

Today we are going to pick up our beautiful little girl we are pretty excited. It is windy today but sunny about 24 or 25 degrees. We are slowly adjusting to the time. This morningI did not wake till the call to prayer at 5:30. I am told that there are two different calls to prayer, one for Muslims and one for Orthodox. I cannot yet distinguish between them but whatever it is it is quite beautiful.

Later: We could not pick up Marie in the AM since Haregwoin was in court this morning. So we went to the National Museum and saw Lucy to pass the time. It was pretty neat. I was surprised at how small the museum really is. After that Messfin took us to a restaurant near the museum and we got to see our first coffee ceremony. After that we were able to go to the foster home to pick up Marie!

I think she recognized us from the last time. They brought her down to us in the clothes we brought. I was happy to see that they fit so well. We played with her, took some pictures and got a little bit of information about her schedule. I found out she gets up in the middle of the night for an hour and a half! That is something to change sooner rather than later! She also takes two naps a day. She is drinking formula as well as wheat cereal from her bottle. She has two teeth though and is coming up on ten months so I think we will try to introduce her to solids soon. Whatever they have been feeding her she certainly isn't suffering! Messfin says he thinks she breaks the record for weight at the foster home! I am not sure how much she weighs now but at Christmas she was around 11 kilos. She certainly feels heavy! She has rolly polly legs and a round little tummy.

We said goodbye to Haregwoin and thanked her for caring for Marie all these months. We left all the donations we had brought for babies. I took a picture of the outside of the foster home and I wish I had been allowed to take pictures of the inside so that I could show Marie later in her life where she waited for us. Messfin took us to buy a couple of supplies (the formula and cereal she was used to eating) and then back to the guest house. We spent the afternoon getting to know each other and resting. It's funny, we expected this to be a really emotional day, but it really wasn't. It just felt normal. I think possibly because we have waited so long for this, we were emotionally prepared or had already expended so much emotion? I am not really sure. The only thing that could have made the day more complete was to have the boys with us. But even with that, I feel like we made the right decision because it will be nice to have time with just the three of us to establish a bit of a bond without dealing with the needs of Ryan and Paul as well. All in all it was a pretty perfect day.

Durame

2008-03-22T07:31:00.007-07:00

Our journal entries from Durame we are going to keep just for our family. However, we thought you might enjoy some pictures from the area.

March 5 2008 (written by Jeremy)

2008-03-21T08:27:00.002-07:00

I'm still recovering from jet-lag and am wide awake at 4:30 am at GMT +3. We're expecting to travel to Kembata today, perhaps as early as noon. I am looking forward to the trip to see more of the country than just the capital city. From what I understand, modernization and industrialization are still very centered in the major urban centersand haven't yet reached the rural populations. It will be interesting to see what Durame is like compared to what we've seen so far in Addis. I've noted how people are quite friendly here and are willing to talk to one another. Mesfin was waiting for traffic to move and while waiting, chatted with the traffic controller. I also saw another vehicle ahead of us later on, the driver was chatting with the occupants of the next vehicle. People also seem to be willing and happy to talk to us, quite often in English.

Later March 4th

2008-03-20T18:41:00.002-07:00

On our way back from buying a few groceries for the trip to Kembata, we passed a mother and her two children on the street. The boy was maybe four and the girl looked about 3. They asked for money for food. We gave them the 10 birr we had (one dollar) and decided to go up to the room to get some more stuff for them. I picked out two sweaters that mom and I had made and a couple of tennis balls. We also gave the children's mother 100 birr. The kids were over the moon happy. They both kissed and hugged us. They had grins from ear to ear. Later when we passed again they were wearing the sweaters (it gets cool in the evening) and playing with the balls. As soon as they saw us they immediately ran up again to see us and give us another hug. They were so cute. Sweet little kids.

We found a restaurant that serves Italian and Indian food (odd combination). We opted for Indian. It was very very good. We enjoyed talking to the waiter who's english was quite good. We slept a good part of the afternoon as we still have not adjusted to the time difference. I thought I would not be sleepy tonight, but I am already tired again.

March 3rd

2008-03-20T10:48:00.007-07:00

We arrive late after over 30 hours of travel. We were releived to find Messfin and Ketema (our drivers) waiting for us. They brought us directly to the guest house which was about a ten minute drive. They checked us in and we collapsed into bed.

March 4th (I think)

We are unsure what day it actually is since we lost a day somewhere along the way. Jeremy and I woke up at 4:30 this morning. We played cards because there was nothing else to do until the rest of the world woke up. We heard the call to prayer (Muslim I think) at around 5 ish. It is a beautiful sound to wake up to. At 7 we went down and had breakfast. Around 9 Messfin and Ketema came by and asked us if we wanted to meet with Haregwoin and meet Marie! We jumped at the chance because we thought we would be unable to meet her until after our trip to Durame. One of the foster home workers brought her down. She was shy with us. She remained stiff and shy for about 15 minutes, not making a single sound. After that she relaxed a little and by the end of the hour she was starting to coo a little. She is a very beautiful baby, round and roll polly. I think it will take her a little while to get used to us. We must look and sound so strange to her. We spent around an hour with her and I thought it would be difficult to give her back, but it wasn't. We knew that she was tired and that she needed the time to process the experience. I hope that next time we meet her, it will be a bit easier. She loved the book I brought for her and she did not want to let it go so we let her keep it. Hopefully she does not lose it because she likes it so much and it would be nice to have. When we were first introduced, Haregwoin asked me if I recognized her and I said "yes", she said "really because this is a different baby!" I nearly died... she said later that the look on my face was priceless. Aparently she finds it funny to tease jetlagged Canadians! It was rather funny in hind sight. The other eventful thing that happened was that I got peed on. At the foster home they use cloth diapers which are not nearly as absorbant. Haregwoin told me that I had been "claimed". It was quite funny. On this day we also made arragements for our trip to the Kembata region. The cost of the vehicle is $100 per day plus fuel. We will leave sometime tomorrow.

Trip Post #1 March 2nd

2008-03-20T10:36:00.005-07:00

(waiting to board in Toronto)

Well so far we have had a reasonably uneventful trip. It was hard to say goodbye to the boys this morning. They came with us to the airport at 4:00 am. The checkin counter was not even open yet. I guess we did not have to arrive as early because we did not realize that this leg was only considered domestic (Victoria to Toronto) We met another couple also on there way their way to adopt, also traveling early. Their son is two months younger than Marie. It was nice to spend the layover in Toronto with them/ getting to know them. Tomorrow they will leave for Uganda to visit their foster child.

The Newest Landed Immigrant!

2008-03-20T06:36:00.006-07:00

Well after 36 hours of travel we are home. We left Addis on March 17th and arrived at 11:40 pm on the 18th. Marie did excellant she was such a trooper. There were 6 other families traveling home all together with their children. This was our approximate itinerary:

Arrive at Bole international airport at 7:00 pm. Leave Addis around 10:00 pm. We were glad to have arrived the full three hours early because there was a glitch with one of our families tickets and they sat at the desk sorting it out until 15 minutes prior to boarding!

Arrive in Khartoum (Sudan) around midnight. Here we had a technical problem so we sat on the tarmac for about 2 hours waiting for them to fix the plane. This made the flight about 10 hours instead of 8. Most of the kids did awesome on this flight although for some of the older ones, it was the first time being buckled in anywhere and they were not impressed with that aspect. All in all though, they were really good. Jeremy and I took turns holding Marie (she weighs 12 kilos and did not have her own seat) and sleeping.

Arrive in Frankfurt around 6:00 AM. We parked ourselves in the McDonald's for our 6 hour wait due mostly to the location in the airport (close to two bathrooms and the shower) and the fact that we knew they would not kick us out. Jeremy and I each paid an appalling $8 US each to have a shower (yes it was worth it!). The prices in Frankfurt after the prices in Addis were quite appalling. At McDonald's Jeremy paid over five euros for an orange juice, a coffee and a croissant! We passed the time chasing the kids around alternating sleeping with our heads on the table. At the end of this layover we said goodbye to Deb Northcott (one of the directors of CAFAC) and an awesome family with two gorgeous little boys (ages 3 and 1). They were travelling via Calgary instead of Toronto.

Arrived in Toronto around 4 pm. This flight took 8 or 9 hours and was probably the easiest leg for us because we scored bulkhead seating and had a bassinet to lay Marie down in. This meant that when she slept we could also sleep. When she was awake, there was enough room at our feet for her to play on the floor. The only time she cried the entire flight was when Jeremy took her to the itty bitty little bathroom to change a dirty diaper. When we arrived in Toronto we passed through customs and immigration which was a breeze. The airport officials were friendly and helpful and we did the whole process in around 30 minutes. At this point she was officially a landed immigrant to Canada! It felt good to be back on Canadian soil even if we were still far from home. We celebrated by taking Marie to Tim Horton's for the first time ever. Yup she is now officially Canadian! On this layover (approx 4 hours). We said goodbye to the rest of the families. This was sad for us because we made some great friends and we are all scattered around the country. The closest family to us is in Vancouver, the rest are all in the prairie provinces. We got onto the flight home around 8 pm. All three of us slept the majority of the flight. We arrived home somewhere around 11 pm. Ryan, Paul, Nina, Mom and Dad, Erin and Devin and Auntie Sylvia and Uncle Bryn were all there at the gate ready to greet us with big smiles on. It was the best homecoming ever. Marie did great, she did not mind being passed around and was fantastic through the big hugs her new brothers gave with great exuberance! She did not even mind being strapped into her car seat. We drove home Caravan style and did not get into bed until around 1 am. It was fantastic. Paul had a hard time going back to sleep and so he was awake until around 2 am. Jeremy and I took shifts of sleep and awake because after all that good behaviour on the plane, Marie was wide awake and raring to go. She slept maybe 45 minutes all night. I have never been more tired in my entire life.

In the morning we all got up and played. The boys were stellar, the brought her toys and played with her and distracted her during diaper changes. They are the most awesome big brothers a little girl could ever hope for. Later in the day we went for a walk down to the lake. We came home and had lunch and my Mom came and took the boys out so that we could have a nap. Jeremy and Marie and I were down for around 5 hours. We drove out to Mom and Dad's and had dinner there, then brought everyone home to bed. We all slept like logs from around 8 pm till 5 (except Jeremy who has been up since 3). The boys are still asleep and Jeremy is busy trying to get Marie down for her morning nap. It is good to be home. I will post about our time in Addis later. We meant to do it during the trip but Ethiopia has blocked blogger.com and so we could not access it.

We're back!

2008-03-20T06:04:00.002-07:00

Quite a trip! Sorry for not updating everyone from the land of "13 Months of Sunshine" (an advertising slogan we saw nearly everywhere). We found ourselves in high-speed Internet access withdrawal with severe symptoms including restricting ourselves to email only and complete access avoidance. We're still suffering from jet-lag and new-child-induced sleep deprivation and are trying to get our lives to a new "normal". When we have a chance and brain capacity, we'll see about putting a couple teaser pictures up, add a few notes and observations, and make you want to go to Ethiopia to create your own. Now, considering I've been up since about 3:30 AM, I'm going to brew a cup of some the 10 KG of coffee I brought back. Stay tuned...

bleary eyed in frankfurt

2008-03-02T23:01:00.002-08:00

well we have made it to frankfurt so far. We are half way between our kids. We miss ryan and paul already. Will up date again when we are not paying by the minute in Euros on a machine with the keys all in the wrong spots! xoxoxoxo

One day left

2008-03-01T07:15:00.002-08:00

Well this is it the last day before we go. We spent the day playing with the boys. We went swimming, to the park and then went out for dinner together with them to white spot which is their favorite "sit down" restaurant. I also showed them the presents I have left for them (one per day we are gone). They were pretty excited. I had a hard time getting Paul to bed until we told him that he gets to get up in the middle of the night and take us to the airport. Nina told him that when they get home they can play even if it is still the middle of the night as long as he sleeps now so that he will have enough rest. That got him in to bed quick!. Our next post will be from Addis!

2 days to go

2008-02-29T10:27:00.012-08:00

Time Line of Adoption

July 2004 First contact with Choices:

We wanted to register with Choices when I was pregnant with Paul, but we were advised to have the baby first and settle with him and then register as we would need to redo the home study after he was born anyway. This turned out to be bad advice and we wish we had registered to begin much sooner.

Feb 2006 Registered with CAFAC and Choices.

I had some confusion during this time as to which agency was responsible for which piece. I found that if I wanted accurate answers about the Ethiopian side of things that it was way easier to ask CAFAC directly rather than go through Choices. I also had to re-do some paperwork (such as the medical and references) as Choices had given me the wrong information regarding what was required.

Feb –April 2006 Home Study/Homework

This was not really an issue for us other than the fact that it was time consuming. We found that a lot of the homework and paperwork that came from the two agencies was similar or repetitive.
May - July 2006 Paper Chase

We spent May through June collecting all the other papers that were required for the dossier. The biggest wait was for our full size birth certificates/marriage certificates to come from Alberta. We all had the wallet size ones already but Ethiopia does not accept these. After that it was all sent away to be notarized and translated into Amharic.

Aug 31st 2006 Confirmation that paperwork arrived in Addis

We had some hiccups along the way but eventually the paperwork was completed and arrived in Addis in one piece. I naively thought that it would be a matter of months to receive a proposal at this point in part I think because up until this point the Canadian process had gone smoothly and we were exceeding the expected timelines. I guess I unrealistically expected that that would continue to happen. Additionally, at the same time as we began, so did many other families from all over the world. This caused a major slow down in how quickly proposals came in. Infant girls (under 1) are by far the most requested. Its funny, no one can tell you that your process isn't different. We all want to believe that we will have our children home quickly.

Feb 28th 2007 Move

We moved from Colwood to Langford in part because we wanted to have a little more room for the baby. Plus we wanted to move from our duplex to a single family home. We made some serious compromises to achieve this though (the house we got is a real fixer upper).

Feb 2007 Passport

I needed to get a new passport, Jeremy's was still valid. I wished I had done this sooner however, because with the new passport laws in effect for travel to the states, I had to wait forever.

March/April 2007 Home Study Update

Because we moved and because it had been a year (home studies are only valid for a year), we had to get a home study update. We grumbled about paying another fee, but it was relatively painless.

Aug 2007 Immunizations

By the time the summer had come and gone, we figured we had better get a start on our immunizations. This hurt the pocket book more than the arm.

Sept/Oct 2007 Van

We became the new proud owners of a van. My Oma and Opa generously gave the van to us knowing that we would not be able to put all three kids in three car seats in the Honda Civic. We really appreciated this as we had no idea how we were going to be able to afford one.

Oct 2007 Proposal

On her 5 month birthday, we received a proposal for a beautiful little girl to join our family. In a daze we signed the papers on the 23rd. We also submitted our second round of immigration papers at this time.

Dec 24th 2007 Court Date

This was our first court date. For some reason, the file didn't even see the light of day in court. We were postponed until Jan 10th.

Jan 5th 2008 Adoption Seminar

Sometime in the previous year the BC govt put forward a new regulation that forced adoptive parents to attend an adoption seminar. It was a good reminder about some of the reading we had done early on in the process. Meeting other parents in the adoption process was great!

Jan 7th 2008 File Update

We received an update on how Marie is doing. Not much had changed but we did get new beautiful pictures and she looked very different from the first set. I wasn't really prepared for that as I had forgotten how much babies change month to month in the first year.

Jan 10th 2008 2nd Court Date

This time the court date went smoothly and we were approved. Jan 18th 2008 Provincial letter of no objection arrived.

Feb 7th 2008 Travel Date is set

We finally found out when we would be traveling! The hold up was waiting for paperwork to be generated in Addis. Most families are held up by the immigration medical, but that was not the case with us. We waited for the adoption decree, new birth certificate and passport to be created and sent to Canadian Immigration. All told, this took just shy of a month, so I guess we finally caught a break.

Three days to go

2008-02-28T08:55:00.002-08:00

This morning when I woke Ryan up for school, he asked me "How do you catch a wishing star". I asked him why he needed a wishing star and he told me that he needs one to wish that Marie could come home without me having to go and get her. :-(.

We had a long talk about it and a cuddle. I am sure he is going to be ok, but comments like that sure tug on my heart strings.

Baby Carrier Trial

2008-02-27T20:51:00.003-08:00

This evening the boys wanted to go for a walk around the lake. We had accidentally left the double stroller out in the rain and so we only had the umbrella stroller and the new baby carrier. Ryan rode in the umbrella stroller and I carried Paul in the baby carrier. It was great... gave me a real chance to try it out. It worked really well and he liked being in it. I wouldn't want to carry him in it too much further than the 5 km around the lake though. He is getting too heavy at 32 lbs to be lugged around. About ten minutes into the walk I commented to Jeremy that this was "real" excercise. Paul piped up "yeah I'm getting good exercise too!" Ha ha ha. I wish we had bought something like this when the boys were little(r). It is way more comfortable than anything we had for them. Obviously it was comfortable for Paul as well because half way around the lake he completely conked out. I am anticipating carrying Marie in it in the front ways position instead of on my back, but we will see how she likes it. The best part is that it is nice and compact. It fits easily in the luggage :-).

4 days to go

2008-02-27T08:52:00.001-08:00

I'm starting to get that "night before christmas" feeling! I am starting to wind things down at work and tie up loose ends everywhere else in my life. My plan is to try to get the house cleaned up tonight and all the last minute stuff packed away. That way we can have time to play with the kids and just be together before we go. Ryan said to me last night "mommy, you are always busy". I felt really terrible. All I could tell him was that it was going to get better after Marie comes home. I snuggled with both the boys last night until they fell asleep... the only problem with that is that I fell asleep too. Jeremy was left doing laundry till 10:00 by himself. He is too good to me. I am very spoiled.

The Before Pictures

2008-02-26T19:35:00.009-08:00

When we bought the house, this room was a mess. The window was broken, the door looked like someone went at it with a hachet, the plaster was crumbling and the room wasn't insulated. If you look carefully you can also see the lovely "rainbow" pattern on the white walls. All in all it was a little overwhelming. Nobody wanted to go in there. It was cold and clausterphobia inducing. I couldn't imagine putting a baby in there the way it was. Now it is my favorite room in the house! We actually made the room marginally smaller (we strapped foam insulation up and then drywalled over it so we lost around 6 inches) but it feels bigger.

The baby room

2008-02-26T18:59:00.014-08:00

Well here they are... the baby room is done. Or rather as done as it is going to be. I didn't quite get everything done. As you can see, there are no curtains yet and I haven't finished reupholstering the rocking chair. But who's counting. I'm pretty pleased with how it came out. Jeremy deserves major major credit here. He thought it would be relatively simple till I got involved and began saying things like "Oh wouldn't it be great if we could recess drawers into the wall?" and "This corner would make an awesome little reading/play area... all we have to do is build a bench that has toy storage in it" by the way if it's going to be a reading area... it needs a light... and while we have the wall open to recess the drawers lets put in a little cubby for books". When we began, the floor had a coat of paint on it. The original plan was to give it a light sanding and repaint... but the floor under just looked too good... All of this was on top of having to insulate and drywall the entire room as well as replacing the broken door and window. Yup. I married a super hero. My mom actually deserves quite a bit of credit as well. Last year I had begun making the baby bedding. I dumped it on her lap just before christmas and she finished it (by finishing, I mean doing most of it). She also came over several nights and put the kids to bed so we could work on the room right after dinner. And when things were looking really grim and we didn't think we could get it all done, Uncle Bryn came over and helped us. I think he has done almost as much work in our house as he has in his own... Thanks again Bryn!

5 days

2008-02-21T08:20:00.004-08:00

Five days left! I finally got the clothes in the drawers for Marie last night. Jeremy also wired the light in. I have a couple more things to do and then we should be done the room. I keep saying this, but truly it might be actually getting there! Ryan and Paul are starting to get nervous about us going. And I am starting to get nervous about leaving them. I have never left them for this long ever. Even though it is really really super early in the morning, I think I will let them come to the airport with us. I think it will help them to say goodbye to us there, rather than saying goodnight/goodbye and waking up and just finding us not there. We have been talking with them quite a bit about what it will be like for them both when we are gone and when we first come back. I am worried about when we come home, because they will be on a different time zone than us and my parents/sister will be exhausted from looking after two energetic boys for 17 days. I suppose we will have to take sleeping shifts. Meals will be another challenge. I imagine we will all be hungry at different times. If I had had more time, I would have prepared some meals ahead of time for after but I just ran out of time (besides, as most of you know I view cooking as one of those necesary evils; one to be postponed until the last possible second).

6 days

2008-02-21T08:19:00.003-08:00

Yeah! We are getting down to the wire. We are beginning to get excited about going instead of just stressed. Over lunch I went to the dollar store and bought the boys a bunch of little items... one for every day we are gone. They are just small (things like books or bouncy balls) but my hope is that they will know that I miss them and I am thinking about them. For the last day, I got them "big brother" tshirts that they can wear to the airport. We did get some sad news though. One of the families in our group has been delayed as their paperwork did not arrive from Nairobi :-(. We are thinking about you guys and hoping you are still able to travel with us.

1 Week

2008-02-21T08:18:00.006-08:00

Ok. Enough whining and moaning about packing. I think we have it done... or almost done. There are still odds and sods floating about and the house looks like it threw up on itself but by and large the stuff is in the bags. We have some amazing friends. My women's bible study group (which I haven't attended in over a year because of work conflicts) made some beautiful blankets and did an awesome job collecting. I also received a couple of monetary donations that I used to buy some clothes for older kids (yeah for the clearance rack at super store). I have a full bag of stuff to give away which is awesome because I did not want to go empty handed. I will publish the pics of the donations tonight when I get home. My mom is one of my heros. If I turn out even a little bit like she is, I'll be doing good. She took a pile of scrap fabric that we had and turned out an enormous number of clothes. They were really cute. Way way better than anything you can buy in the store.

8 days

2008-02-21T08:16:00.003-08:00

The soccer ball saga. Yesterday, people from the Vancouver office donated $140 for me to buy soccer balls in Addis! Thanks guys! I am really excited to be able to deliver the balls to the kids. It will be a really gratifying thing to do because I am told that Ethiopians are mad over "football".

Today we pick up Jeremy and do all our running around, so I had better get going and do it!

9 Days Left

2008-02-21T08:15:00.001-08:00

I am really glad that the weekend is on the horizon. This weekend is do or die for getting stuff done. If it doesn't get done this weekend it probably isn't happening! Jeremy is flying home tomorrow morning out of Castlegar. I hope his flight isn't delayed because as soon as he hits the ground, the running around and mad frantic packing panic begins.

2008-02-21T08:03:00.002-08:00

Days left before we go. I have caught a nasty cold. I suppose that its better now then closer to travel. Last night I did nothing to prepare for the trip. I got home, ate supper (thanks mom!) and played with the boys a bit before putting them to bed. Then I crawled into bed myself. 8:00 and I was out. You'd think I'd be well rested and alert this a.m. but no such luck. Paul AND Ryan crawled into bed with me part way through the night. Paul wanted to snuggle with me but kept kicking off all the blankets. Everytime I moved over, he snuggled in right against me until I was clinging to the edge of the bed. I spent half the night wondering how I was going to deal with THREE kids in the bed with me. Either we buy a king size bed or figure out a different arrangement. At home, Jeremy and I frequently end up sleeping in the boy's beds after they crawl into ours. Its like musical chairs but a lot less fun... and frequently I am the one who ends up without the chair! Paul informed me the other day when we were setting up the crib for Marie, that when she was scared, she could come and sleep in his bed. I asked him where he was going to sleep if Marie slept in his bed... He quite calmly informed me that he would sleep in his BIG bed (meaning mine!). I told him that he needs to sleep in his own bed, to which he replied "I will when I'm five"... it could be a very long two years.

Travel Registry With Canadian Gov't

2008-02-20T14:02:00.002-08:00

I heard from a friend that the Canadian government offers a service whereby you can register that you’re travelling in a particular country. That way they can offer assistance faster and/or contact you if there is trouble in the country and they need to evacuate you. http://www.voyage.gc.ca/dest/report-en.asp?country=85000 Good advice for fellow travellers!

Eleven days to go

2008-02-20T11:00:00.004-08:00

We will be flying out in 11 days... Airline tickets are finally booked. After much hair pulling and gnashing of teeth and ranting we decided to book with the travel agent recommended by the adoption agency. We were very disappointed with this process and ended up having to pay way more than we should have. But we are booked and it is done. We are flying with Lufthansa and they are supposed to be quite good. I was also able to secure travel insurance for Marie (see post below). Things are (slowly) coming together in the baby room. I am hoping to have enough of it done to post pictures by this weekend (yes, I know, just in time) but with Jeremy gone this week, it has been quite hard for me to accomplish anything outside the very basic. The alternator also went on the car :-(. All in all, so far it hasn't been a great week. I am very much looking forward to having everything done and being on the plane!

Adoption Statistics.

2008-02-18T16:09:00.002-08:00

I was looking up Canadian Adoption Statistics. The stats for last year 2007 are not yet available but I was really encouraged to see that between 2005 and 2006 adoptions from Ethiopia nearly doubled! Also, considering BC's population we do a lot of adoptions... Way to go BC! Check out the stats here they are quite interesting: http://www.adoption.ca/ACCArticle_2006Stats.htm

Count Down

2008-02-18T14:05:00.005-08:00

13 days until we leave! 10 more days of work!. I seem to be into count downs and lists lately. To be fair, I have always been a list maker. Lately though I feel like I need lists to keep track of my lists. Jeremy is gone for the next week (doing training seminars in the interior) so I am on my own with the boys. I have an enormous amount to accomplish before the trip, so every night I am trying to put them to bed a little earlier, but I am finding that difficult also, because I miss them and I want to spend time with them. The stress is beginning to trickle down to them and is affecting their behaivor. Kids are amazing. They sense the upcoming change in their lives and are responding to it in the best way that they know how. This translates into them arguing more (normally they are best buddies and play really well together) and being more clingy which is difficult, especially with daddy away. I wonder if we are doing the right thing leaving them behind... I haven't even begun packing yet... Yup. Stress at its best. I have not begun to get really excited yet because I am simply overwhelmed by the amount of work left. We are almost finished the baby room. I just have a couple more things to do (paint the bench we built, sew curtains and recover the rocking chair) See there I go with the lists again.

Travel Insurance For Adopted Children

2008-02-12T10:37:00.000-08:00

One of the other families traveling at the same time as us has investigated buying travel insurance for their adopted children. Many people have trouble purchasing this insurance since their children are not yet covered under Canadian medical (such as MSP here in BC). They found that this company was willing and able to provide travel insurance for adoptees coming home: http://www.travelprotectors.com/adoption.shtml/ Hopefully you will find it helpful. We did, so thanks!

Exactly one month

2008-02-08T17:55:00.000-08:00

I actually don't have much to say other than... in exactly one month, I will be holding my little baby girl! I still believe that it is inappropriate to publish Marie's picture but I have sufficiently convinced myself that there is no harm in a sneak peak since this contains really no identifying information...

TRAVEL.... Yipee!

2008-02-07T07:33:00.000-08:00

We have our dates! March 8th we will meet Marie! WAHOO. I have never been more excited about a trip in my whole life. We probably will go early so we can travel to Durame and to visit Marie's village. That means less than 1 month! I better get cracking, I have a list longer than my leg of stuff I have to do still! We will probably be gone March 2nd - 18th... if you are a theif, don't bother the house is still occupied ;-). Plus, our house doesn't seem to contain anything that would interest an adult... I think the toys breed in the toy box... =-)

HAP Meeting on Thursday

2008-02-06T12:07:00.000-08:00

For those who will not be able to make it out on Thursday, Nina has compiled some stories of people she met while working at HAP (Hope After Parents). Do take the time to read them.

Sylivia

Sylivia was a 13 year old girl who was at the top of her class when she found herself pregnant. At this time Sylvias parents had already died and she was being looked after by an older brother who, when he discovered Sylivia was pregnant insisted she marry the man responsible (she was 13 at the time) and when she refused he kicked her out. Sylvia now has a three year old and is still living on her own with her child, she digs in other peoples gardens to pay for rent of her house and to buy food for her and her daughter, when she has extra money she pays for her own school fees so she can continue her education. When I asked her what she wanted the most, she told me that she wanted to return to school. When I visited Sylivias home we found that she had no blanket for her and her daughter to sleep with on her mat on the dirt floor, we left her with a blanket, sheets, mosquito net and some kitchen items that she lacked, and when my mother came to Uganda to visit we gave her a sweater and a blanket for her daughter. After returning to Canada I got the news that her relatives visited her and upon finding her with new items insisted that she hand them over and when she didn't comply they beat her and took them. Sylvia deepest wish was to go to school and she needs a safe place where no one can harm her or her daughter. HAP and Canadian donors have provided her with school fees, exam fees, school uniform and her school needs so she can attend a secondary boarding school. Syliva has found a kind neighbour to care for her daughter while she attends school. She started school this Monday.

Tumuhimbise

The first day that I visited the children in their homes I met Tumuhimbise, she is not an orphan she is a mother whose children are not yet 'complete orphans'. Tumuhimbise has AIDS which she contracted from her husband who upon discovering he was sick sold all the family land and house to pay for his medical bills. After his death he left behind four children with no land and a sick mother. Tumuhimbise has tested positive for HIV and qualifies to receive antiviral medication from a local NGO. She however cannot always afford to pay for the journey to the hospital once a month to receive the medication and see a doctor. The doctors have told her that the medication will not work if she is not eating healthy food and resting, but she told us that she cannot rest when her children need food and money for school fees. Tumuhimbise neighbours have built her a house and she works in her neighbours gardens digging for money and food as her husband left her without any land to grow food for her family. The day we visited this family the eldest son had been sent home from school as they were unable to pay for his school fees, he told us that he didn't want anything except to be able to go back to school. We also discovered that the youngest child was sick and showing signs of AIDS but due to lack of funds she has not been tested or even seen a doctor. Part of our plan for HAP is to create a clinic/dispensary as part of the school and for the community. The hope is that the children that are infected (often from their mothers) can get the medical care that they need and the children that are not yet 'complete orphans' have a chance to have their remaining parent get healthy and try to prevent more 'complete orphans' that are living alone without any parental guidance.

Child-headed Families

Nothing quite prepared me to visit a family of children that live completely alone, but unfortunately it was not just one family. On the second day that I visited the children I met several families of orphans living alone, the eldest usually around 12-14 years old caring for his or her younger siblings. The last family that we visited on this day had no beds, blankets or any bedding aside from some banana leaves and dirty plastic sheets. We left them with warm blankets, sheets and mosquito nets and some kitchen items that they needed and as we were about to leave them they asked us to please wait. The went around to the back of their house and returned with two papayas to give to us in return for the blankets and other things we had given them. It took everything in me not to cry as we walked away from these children. Again and again after each family of children that I walked away from it tore my heart to pieces. No child in Canada would have been left alone for one day without a guardian, let alone in those conditions. It was on this day that my heart committed itself to helping these children to find a place for them that is safe where they can have some time to be children again, where the worries of basic needs are someone else's to bear, some adult. Where they can get the guidance that they need to grow up to be adults with morals and values and who know right from wrong, because right now no one is teaching them this. HAP's vision for a boarding school is a place where this can happen, a place that will cater to the special needs of children who have no parents.

Rosette

My first memory of Rosette was meeting her in the home that she was staying in. Rossette has no family left and was taken in by strangers. When we met her in her home she looked incredibly sad. At the time we did not know what was going on, but a few weeks later we found out that her neighbour was raping her. She is 14 and no doubt feels helpless and powerless. At least 8 out of 10 women and girls in Uganda are raped at least once in their lives and orphan girls are the most vulnerable to this. Unfortunately there is little repercussions for the man responsible because these cases typically never get to court. The HAP counselor is currently counseling Rossette. When my mother heard about what was happening to Rossette she decided to do something to help, to somehow get her out of the living situation she was in. It was decided that the best solution would be to send her to boarding school. Janet donated the funds to pay for her school fees, her uniform and other school items. I am happy to tell you that on Monday Rosette started school at Kashozi (the school I was at and where two of the HAP members also work as teachers) Rosette will be safe living and studying at Kashozi and will have the support of the two HAP members close by. Bago told me that she was very excited after her first day at school.Sadly what happened to Rosette happens to many of the girl orphans who have no one to defend them or to turn to for help. Part of building is school for the orphans is so that HAP can provide a safe place to protect these girls who have no one to defend them. HAP also wants to educate the community that it is not ok to abuse defenseless orphans. Also at a HAP school the children could get the counseling to deal with the trauma that they have lived through. Most of these children are traumatized by the death of their parents, by being left alone in the world and then by the mistreatment, abuse and violence that they experience at the hand of the few adults in their lives.

No news is not good news.

2008-01-29T12:21:00.000-08:00

We still have not heard anything about if the appropriate paperwork has been produced so we can book our travel. We have been told that the paperwork (adoption decree, birth certificate, and passport) can take between 3 and 6 weeks to generate. We passed the three week marker last Thursday. So we are hoping that it will come soon.

HOPE AFTER PARENTS:

As many of you know, we have been supporting my sister in her endeavors with Hope After Parents (HAP) an organization she became involved with while living in Uganda. This organization tries to provide for the basic needs for orphans in a rural part of Bushenyi, Uganda. It was started by a handful of local Ugandan teachers who make very little money themselves, but have big hearts for the orphans of the area. The founder, Moses, was an orphan himself growing up. There are well over 200 orphans living in this small community, many are HIV + themselves, all are living in extreme poverty. Unfortunately, HAP had very few resources to help the children, which is where we came in.

Nina initially went to Uganda to do her research for her Masters Degree in education. She was doing participatory research teaching teachers how to use computers and other technology to augment their teaching. These schools, have dirt floors and very few resources so you can imagine, using computers and the internet is quantum leap for them and opens up a world of resources. Nina told me that the teachers started referring to the internet as "the world's library".

On the weekends Nina started helping Moses with the orphans (there are over 200 locally). She fell in love with the kids and plans to return as soon as she can. We began by just trying to provide the families of orphans with basics like a mattress, blanket and mosquito net (many were sleeping right on the ground and had nothing to cover them) but eventually the dream is to open a school specifically for the kids so that they can have a place not only to learn but somewhere to call home with loving adults to care for them. To that end, my family has pooled our resources and we have purchased a piece of land. The land is being cleared and when we have more money we will begin building a school. In the meantime, we have purchased treadle sewing machines and many of the orphans are learning to sew! The idea is not only to provide them with the book learning they need but also to endow them with skills that they can take to the market. Before Nina came along, Hope After Parents had little more than hope, now we are putting some real resources behind that hope and the children are beginning to dream of a future.

Have I piqued your interest? WE NEED YOU. Next Thursday (Feb 7) we are hosting an information night for our friends and family that might be interested in learning more about our project. We plan to spend the evening brainstorming ideas about the situation and how we can move forward. Nothing I have ever done is more important than this and I would like to extend the invitation to you.

Contact me for more information on the evening via the normal channels.

Let the Collecting Begin!

2008-01-24T12:21:00.000-08:00

In both our previous house and our current house, there is a distinct lack of storage space... if I start mumbling any time soon about looking for housing, remind me not to buy another house that has no closets! Because we knew that the adoption process was going to take awhile, I did not really want to begin collecting orphanage donations right away. I put it off and put it off and now I am feeling panicky. So I am once again, asking for help. The items I would like to take are: 1) new children's clothes/shoes and 2) deflated soccer balls. I have a list of other acceptable items but these are the ones I would like to focus on. If you would like to contribute, I would be really really greatful as it is a way for me to give a tiny bit back to the country that is giving my family such a beautiful gift. Not to mention that it is a great way to help Ethiopian kids! Get in touch with me via the usual channels and I will make sure your items get to the right place in hopefully around a month... ok.... the panicky feeling is coming back.

Provincial Letter of No Objection

2008-01-18T15:17:00.000-08:00

Yeah! Another step in the process came through for us today. Today we received our provincial letter of no objection. This is a letter issued by the province to the Canadian High Commision indicating that they have no objection to our adoption of Marie. The only thing we are still waiting on is the adoption decree, followed by a new birth certificate, followed by a passport. As soon as those are submitted to Nairobi, we can book our flights! Jeremy and I are still discussing whether or not we are going to take the extra time and go visit Durame (where Marie is from). We would want to do the trip before we take custody of Marie because it is a hard journey and would be stressful at the least with a baby.

Success In Court

2008-01-14T12:54:00.000-08:00

We heard today that the court date was successful! That means the adoption decree should be handed down this week! We could be travelling in 4 to 6 weeks provided things in Nairobi are stable enough to get the paperwork through. Our daughter is officially ours! YEAH!!! Very exciting day for our little family!

Children's books

2008-01-12T12:22:00.000-08:00

	ISBN: 978-0152010744 The Story Tellers Beads From Publishers Weekly Set in the mid-1980s, a time when Ethiopia is hard-hit by drought and political strife, Kurtz's (Trouble) eye-opening novel charts the converging paths of two young natives fleeing from their country. Sahay, a Christian orphan, and Rahel, a blind Jewish girl, have been taught to be enemies, but discover they have much in common when they join a large group of refugees on their way to Sudan: both have suffered hunger and persecution, have been torn from their families and regret leaving their homeland. Through the girls' alternating points of view, Kurtz conveys how the fellow travelers' mutual mistrust of one another gradually grows into reliance upon each other for aid and consolation. When soldiers force Sahay's uncle and Rahel's brother to turn back, Sahay experiences her first pang of pity for the "blind Falasha" girl and offers to be her guide. In turn, Rahel soothes Sahay's lagging spirit with inspirational stories from the Old Testament. Besides presenting an historically accurate account of mass exodus from Ethiopia (additional information appears in an afterword), the story pays tribute to survivors who find the strength and courage to help others reach freedom. Ages 8-12. Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	ISBN: 978-0736843546 Reading level: Ages 4-8
	0152000364 Faraway Home From School Library Journal Kindergarten-Grade 3-Desta's grandmother is ill in faraway Ethiopia, and her father must return to his native land to help out. As he cuddles his daughter on his lap, he describes the place of his birth. The child pairs his experiences with hers and wonders whether the cowbells he remembers sound like the wind chime on their front porch. The man's love and yearning for home is obvious, and the little girl worries that he may never return to her. Finally reassured that he will come back, she asks him so many questions about his childhood home that when he sings in his native tongue, she begins to see "-a pink cloud of flamingos rippling up from a dark blue lake-." Lewis captures the lyricism and rich imagery of the text with his evocative, realistic watercolors. Soft browns, blues, greens, and pinks predominate in paintings that flow to the edge of pages for scenes set here, and fade off into white for those set in the Ethiopia of memory and longing. Text and illustrations combine to immerse readers in the sights and sounds of the African homeland, and the beautifully crafted whole gives fresh meaning to the terms "family," "separation," and "home."-Diane S. Marton, Arlington County Library, VA Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	0152002197 Amazon.com This charming children's story is based on a story that author Jane Kurtz heard growing up in Ethiopia. In it, young Tekleh is always getting into trouble, letting the goats into the garden, kicking dust on the roasting coffee beans. So his father gives him a gift of a wooden board game, which he promises will keep Tekleh out of trouble. We follow Tekleh the next morning as he takes the family's two goats to graze, and has a series of adventures before he returns home, the same but different. Durga Berhnard's warm, earth-toned illustrations are the perfect companion to this book.
	174059133
	0192745352 When the World Began From School Library Journal Grade 4-6-Twenty pourquoi tales, myths, and extended jokes paint a picture of a vibrant culture, open to the world around it. The title story tells how people stole the gift of dominance from God's favorite creature, the buffalo, and is followed by selections that explain such things as how the tortoise got her shell, how one might best depose a tyrant, and how arrogance and pride are answered. Some stories are reminiscent of Aesop and some of Perrault. The fluid recountings read aloud or tell equally well. Folktale enthusiasts who prefer to read their stories will find the tales extended by the work of four artists. Deep-hued oil pastels and jewel-toned watercolors have a sense of volume and heft, while the realistic pen-and-ink vignettes that accompany some endings add reality and grounding. Other stories are illustrated with cut-paper cartoons, accentuating their humor. This well-rounded collection could be used with multicultural offerings like Virginia Hamilton's In the Beginning (Harcourt, 1988) or as a springboard for Ted Hughes's slightly more sophisticated and tongue-in-cheek Tales of the Early World (Farrar, 1991). A solid addition to most folktale collections. Ann Welton, Terminal Park Elementary School, Auburn, WA Copyright 2000 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	0208024298 The Lion's Whiskers From School Library Journal Grade 4-7. The earlier title by the same name (Little, Brown, 1959; o.p.) had 31 stories divided by region and accompanied by background material on the culture of each place. The present edition culls 16 of the favorite stories from that book and provides striking woodcut illustrations, making the tales more accessible to younger audiences. Some of the stories have clear morals and give messages about love, honor, courage, and wisdom. Others, in the way of oral tradition, end abruptly with the storyteller asking listeners to provide their own conclusions or leave the ending open for an additional tale. The characters are people of various regions and faiths; animals such as lions, hyenas, baboons, and turtles; kings and commoners; and even a thumb-sized character who could be compared to the Western Thumbelina. The diversity of cultures in this nation is revealed by selections that come out of the Christian tradition and Old Testament stories told by the Jews who live there. Each story is framed by a short introduction to the teller and the circumstances in which it was heard, thus providing some understanding of the story tradition in Ethiopia and a connection to the previous tale. An introduction provides background to the book and an afterword updates it to show the historical changes in Ethiopia since the first book was published. A selection worth acquiring for folktale collections or to supplement African studies.?Barbara Chatton, College of Education, University of Wyoming, Laramie Copyright 1997 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	0516236806
	0689803249 Pulling the Lion's Tail From School Library Journal Grade 2-4?A retelling of the Ethiopian folktale "The Lion's Whiskers." In the traditional story, a new stepmother learns to be patient in drawing her stepson into accepting her. Kurtz's version has a female child as the central character, emphasizing her persistent attempts to reach out to her father's new wife after her mother's death. The details of mourning and her daily life make the forlorn Almaz seem real, and the respectful warmth of her relationship with her wise grandfather is sensitively portrayed. The author's note may help American children to appreciate the stepmother, who appears to reject all of the girl's initiatives. Kurtz's language has a tender lyricism further emphasized by Cooper's oil paintings. A brown wash mutes the background colors, creating a timeless sense of story. At the same time, the illustrations, including the appearance of the child and the use of hot colors in the background, give a much less authentic sense of Ethiopia than E.B. Lewis's illustrations for Kurtz's Fire on the Mountain (S.&S., 1994). Pulling the Lion's Tale is a good story that may be especially helpful to American children in blended families. Like so many picture books with African settings, it is less than entirely successful in projecting ideas about Africa.?Loretta Kreider Andrews, Enoch Pratt Free Library, Baltimore, MD Copyright 1995 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	068918963 Fire on the Mountain From Publishers Weekly Young Alamayu's bravery goes unrewarded by a selfish rich man until the boy's clever sister puts things to rights. "Exceptional watercolors of Ethiopian mountains and mountain people quicken Kurtz's revision of a well-known tale," said PW. Ages 4-8. Copyright 1998 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	0805036520
	0809167077 The Saint and His Lion We have this book and it is ok. The kids like it but it is not their favorite.
	0823418588
	0960567097 The Story of Coffee We have this one. It is really quite good. Written by a Canadian/Ethiopian whose relatives run an Ethiopian restaurant in Vancouver! Kids like it. The pictures are good and it has both English and Amharic.
	1577657578
	1877810940 The Perfect Orange From Publishers Weekly The author and illustrator of Nekane, the Lami?a & the Bear present the second volume in the Toucan Tales series of international folktales. Discovering a perfect orange in her Ethiopian mountain village, Tshai travels to the city to tender her prize to the great Nigus. When the girl passes the house of the Lord Hyena, the jeering animal scorns her silly gift. But the ruler himself is so moved that he tries to reward Tshai with riches. When she refuses, Nigus orders his Royal Chamberlain to follow her and give her a donkey whose saddle bags are filled with gold and jewels. The greedy hyena hastens to offer Nigus his bountiful lands and cattle. In return, the wise Nigus bestows on the crafty hyena "our most prized possession": one perfect orange. Li's watercolors contrast the cocoa-brown hues of the countryside and buildings with the stark white robes and brilliantly colored accessories of traditional Ethiopian dress; it's odd, however, that his Ethiopian characters have such pink skin. Araujo, who came across this tale while working in the Harare region of Ethiopia, spices up his retelling by incorporating Amharic words and phrases. Ages 3-12. Copyright 1994 Reed Business Information, Inc.
	9781424303
	B00002414D CD of kids music from Ethiopia
	A life like mine. 1405314605 We have this one and the kids love it. Not exclusively about Ethiopia, but it describes how children live around the world and the basic rights of the child. Put out by Unicef.

Price of Flights

2008-01-09T18:07:00.000-08:00

Anyone out there traveling in the next little while? I was just wondering if anyone knows or has researched how much flights to Addis cost this time of year... I am anticipating that we will travel in early to mid march. I have done a little bit of preliminary research and it looks to be between 1500 and 3000 per person... Has anyone successfully traveled for adoption on aeroplan points? Our second hearing is scheduled for Thursday (Wednesday night local time). Hopefully, this time everything goes well and it will not have to be postponed or rescheduled or require a second one... I'll post as soon as I know :-)

New Pictures and an Update

2008-01-07T14:01:00.000-08:00

We got new photos of the baby! Apparently she is doing very well. She now weight 9.4 kg, so she is growing well. She has grown some hair too! Apparently she is a happy little soul and is very easy going according to the report. Give me a shout and you can come over and see the pics!

Adoption Seminar

2008-01-06T09:27:00.000-08:00

Jeremy and I attended an all day adoption seminar at choices yesterday to satisfy a fairly new provincial requirement. It was nice to connect with some other adoptive families. Most families were at the beginning of their process. It was amazing to me how many other families are now adopting from Ethiopia. When we went to Choices originally to inquire about adopting in Africa, they had never done it before. Yesterday, over half the families in attendance were adopting from Ethiopia. This is good news for us, as our daughter will have other adoptees to connect with locally who are also from Ethiopia. While we did not get to spend a much needed day renovating, it was good to have a refresher on much of the earlier reading and education we had done... now back to renovating!

Court Date Rescheduled

2008-01-04T11:45:00.000-08:00

Our court date was rescheduled. It will now take place on the tenth of January. Needless to say we are disappointed. No reason was given for the rescheduling. This pushes the first possible travel date out of February and into March. If a decision is handed down on the tenth, the earliest possible travel date is March 6th. More likely, it will be later. We are also very concerned about the situation in Kenya. As the civil unrest continues and essential services are shut down there is a distinct possibility that things at the embassy will slow down or even shut down completely. If this is the case, we are not sure what will happen with our immigration process, but it can only mean further delay. Please pray for the situation in Kenya, not just because it has an effect on our adoption, but also because of the millions of people there that deserve better. Pray that civil war will be avoided and peace can be re-stored.

On Pins and Needles

2008-01-04T08:47:00.001-08:00

Apparently the phone call has been made this morning. When I called CAFAC this morning (15 minutes ago), they were on the phone call to Addis. I should hear any time now!

AHHH Still Nothing

2008-01-03T10:03:00.000-08:00

Another day and still no news. Its now past evening in Ethiopia and CAFAC could not get through. I am assuming that there will be nothing now until at least tomorrow. I'm going a little crazy waiting to hear as it has been 11 days...

Bill C-14

2008-01-02T12:31:00.000-08:00

Bill C-14 came into effect late this Dec. Basically, the idea is to treat children adopted to Canadian parents the same as Canadian children born overseas. In other words, instead of going through the immigration process, these children would be eligible for Canadian citizenship right away. This sounds great in theory, but I was concerned because we are already half way through the old process and did not want to have to file a whole new set of paperwork. I called CAFAC today to try to get some clarification on what the process will be... it turns out that applying for Canadian citizenship in a foreign jurisdiction is an onerous process. With the current process we expect to travel 4-6 months after acceptance of our child proposal, if we used the new system it could take a year! I'll stick with the old system thanks. It means that we will have to apply for citizenship here in Canada, but while we wait, our daughter is here with us. Marie will travel to Canada on an Ethiopian passport and we will be required to get a German visa on the way. These are hassles, but nothing compared to having to wait another 6 months or more. Yup... the old system works for me. Even for new families, not already in the immigration queue, CAFAC is advising that they use the old system. The only value that I can see in Bill C-14 is for ex pats. It means that they will not have to come to Canada and wait here for citizenship for their adopted children. I am just greatful we are not being forced into the new system. BTW. Still no news regarding the court date, as CAFAC was unable to get a line through to the Ethiopian office. We are hoping to hear tomorrow :-( Happy New Year.

Krahnicles 2007

2007-12-24T13:39:00.000-08:00

Once again, we have managed to have another adventurous year. Between buying a renovation project, starting our oldest in school and youngest in preschool, all while waiting for our adoption to slowly proceed through it’s steps, we’ve quite successfully managed to stay out of trouble. In March of last year we said “goodbye” to our duplex on Metchosin Rd and “hello” to our renovation on Leigh Rd. Yes, you understood correctly. We completed our fix-ups, improvements, and repairs on the last house just in time to sell it and buy an even bigger renovation project. Upon moving in, we promptly tore apart the basement and put in a basement suite with the idea that a rental income will bring in some extra money to fix up the rest of the house. We knew that the house, a 1940’s Cape Cod style, needed a lot of work. We didn’t bargain on quite how much work it would require. So far we have completely redone one bedroom and the bathroom. Both have turned out lovely but it was not lovely getting them that way. To some of you the words “lathe and plaster” will explain it all. Anyway, our tenant was gracious enough to stay with us through the whole process, including the re-plumbing phase in which she had the pleasure of an indoor waterfall. We have learned a lot of lessons about careers we do not want… ever. In the New Year we will tackle the baby room, which brings me to the next part in our story. February 2008 will mark two years in our adoption process from Ethiopia. We are happy to finally have something to report! Early in the New Year we will travel to Addis Ababa to bring home beautiful Marie Krahn. She was born on May 18th 2007 and we hope to celebrate her first birthday here at home. We really appreciate your continued prayers and support for us during this adventure. Ryan began kindergarten this year at École John Stubbs in the French Immersion program and has been enjoying teaching his little brother and his parents French. He continues to amaze us with his endless energy and enthusiasm, not only for school, but also for his other activities. His favourite activities still include playing “super hero” with his brother, throwing rocks in the lake, swimming, and fishing with Dad. We have been impressed with what a great big brother he is and how well he and Paul get along. Paul is our little fireball. Always pushing himself to master new skills, he is anxious always to keep up with Ryan. One day while picking up Ryan from school, Leah caught him on the playground trying to convince kids easily double his size that he was bigger than they were and, in terms of personality, he was right! Paul loves preschool and is developing quite a sense of humour. He loves to tease and be teased. His language skills are in full bloom and we often joke about “Radio Paul being on 24/7”. Leah began a new job this fall at Custom House testing software systems once again and will continue work until the baby Marie arrives home. Prior to that, she was working part time at our church doing office administration work. Leah misses being home with the boys very much but we are blessed to have Auntie Erin, Leah’s new sister-in-law, looking after the boys. Both Ryan and Paul enjoy her very much and look forward to the new adventures she has planned for them. Leah is very much looking forward to being home again with the kids this spring. Jeremy plans to take some time off also this summer and we are hoping to take a trip out to Alberta to visit family and friends and also to learn how to be a family of five. Jeremy is entering his second year at Number 41 Media. He is enjoying the work, but has come to realise that IT may not be the thing he wants to do from now until retirement. We are beginning to explore other avenues including humanitarian work overseas. Our current plan is to spend the next year settling in with our newest addition while continuing to explore our options. In the meantime we are working with the rest of our family on a really awesome project aimed at building a school for aids orphans in Uganda. In the area that my sister lives, there are over 200 of these children. If you would like more information or think that you could help in some way, please let us know. It has indeed been an adventurous year with its challenges and accomplishments. We expect nothing less for 2008!

7 Month Birthday

2007-12-19T12:40:00.000-08:00

Yesterday marked baby Marie's 7 month "birthday" and the passing of the second month we have had our proposal! We are really happy, but also sad that we could not share it with her. I am still hopeful that her 10 month "birthday" will happen in Canada. :-). I'm still holding out for travel in February. I also found out yesterday that choices, (via kids link) has a new African program out facilitating adoptions in Zambia! http://www.kids-link.ca/country_zambia.html. This is wonderful news. Choices also mentioned that they are working on Ghana program. Kids Link was not available when we began our process. They are still providing referrals quicker than CAFAC and people who signed up as much as a year after we did already have their children home. Even now, having our child proposal this is hard to accept. It does not seem fair. I tell myself that I have to accept that things happen for a reason, but it is still hard. I am always happy to hear when families recieve their proposals, but I find myself struggling to be pleased for families going through kids link when I hear about how quick it went. This is an illogical feeling, but still very real for me. Having said that, CAFAC has been nothing but fabulous to us throughout the whole process. Their tenure in Ethiopia, gives me confidence in their process. I also know 100% that they always operate in the best interests of the children. From that perspective, I cannot recommend them enough. I also appreciate the fact that the directors, have very real, personal experience with the process; they are adoptive parents from Ethiopia as well.

Medical Papers from Nairobi

2007-12-16T10:18:00.001-08:00

Our medical papers arrived from Nairobi! To all of you not doing Ethiopian adoptions, I'll explain: Part of the process for Canadian immigration is for an immigration medical to take place. The nearest Canadian embassy happens to be in Nairobi. In order for that process to begin, the embassy has to send immigration paperwork to CAFAC in Addis so that they can have a immigration medical done. In some cases this process can take up to three months, holding up the entire process. I was super excited to receive news of this because it means that if our court proceedings are successful in one hearing, the rest of the adoption paperwork could be completed within the next six to nine weeks! This means that we could travel as soon as the end of February. So, please pray that our adoption takes only one court hearing! WAHOO. I don't care about my two front teeth... all I want for Christmas is a successful court hearing. In fact, if it would help, I'd give my two front teeth!

Court Date

2007-11-26T17:23:00.000-08:00

Yeah! We have a court date! On Christmas Eve this year, the Ethiopian courts will hopefully hand down the decision to grant Jeremy and I custody of Marie. The judge has the option of requesting additional hearings if he/she feels they are necessary, we are praying that this will not be the case. After the courts have granted permission we still have to wait for all the documentation to make it to the Canadian Embassy in Nairobi. After that we can go and pick her up! We are still anticipating that we will travel sometime between February and April.

6 Month Birthday

2007-11-19T12:06:00.000-08:00

Our little girl turned 6 months yesterday! I was very proud of myself. I didn’t cry. I am just hoping and praying that we will celebrate her one year birthday with her in the flesh. I feel like we are already missing so many of her firsts, I really don’t want to miss that one. In that first year, so much changes. I look at her picture every day, and it makes me sad that already in the one month since we got her photo, she has probably changed and I am missing it. I find myself both attracted to and repelled by other people’s children around this age. I am attracted to them, because I want to know what milestones our little girl is likely approaching. I want to remember what that age is like. Even though I had the boys at that age, it is so hard to remember what it was like in any particular month, it all kind of blends together. Also, I don’t think I realized what a precious gift I had been given. I did not enjoy them as much as I should have. I did not pay enough attention to the details. I did not take enough time to cuddle them and just enjoy them… which brings me to the repelled feeling I have. I don’t want to see other people with their children of the same age because it hurts. I want to tell the parents how lucky they are, how they don’t know what a precious gift they are holding. I can’t take my eyes of them but I don’t want to hold their little ones, because I might cry or say something inappropriate. I guess in these kids, I am looking for some clue, some insight into what my baby’s life is like, but in the end there is no substitute for having her home. Having said that, I am coming to realize that God’s timing is perfect and no matter what, it’s going to be ok. God will bring her home in His timing, not mine and in the end I will be glad that it happened that way… its just hard right now. He is giving us time to get our resources together. He is giving us time to work on her room (yes, we finished the bathroom and are moving onto the baby room next weekend!) and He is giving Ryan and Paul time to settle into their routines at school. In short, our lives are getting sorted out so that we can bring A home into as stable an environment as possible. If I had it my way, she would be home already, amidst the renos and chaos. I would not have been able to go to work and get parental benefits which would throw us further into debt. We also would not have had the van yet… so it’s a good thing I don’t always get my way ... and if any of you choose to remind me that I said that I will deny deny deny!

New Stuff

2007-11-11T06:40:00.000-08:00

Until we found out how big/old she was, I tried to hold off buying things for our little one... I satisfied my cravings with window shopping. Since then somehow I have developed a magnetic attraction to stores for little kids... I can be shopping for groceries and mysteriously find myself in the clothing section... and then in the baby section... and then in the baby girl section... I have found some cool little things though. We have found a little soft photo album to put our pictures in and send to the CAFAC foster home. Hopefully the staff will have some time to show her the pictures and let her play with the book. I have also bought a baby carrier. It is pretty awesome. It can hold a kid up to 40lbs (which begs the question: why would you want to carry a forty pound kid?) front, back or on the hip. Yesterday we took a reprieve from working and went to Royal Roads to play with the kids. They had a blast and when Paul got tired I was able to piggyback him in the carrier. We just have to be careful that he doesn't think its for HIM! It worked awesome though. Much less strain then other ways of hauling around a kid who is really big enough to be walking :-). The other bonus is that it is compact which will make it easy to take with us. I also have found a kids cd of music from Africa including some from Ethiopia! Its really neat, the kids like it and so do I. And then of course there's the clothes... I enjoyed shopping for each of the boys when they were born, but not nearly as much as I have enjoyed shopping for our daughter. Some of my friends bought little outfits for me for my birthday knowing that I would love that way more than anything for me. I don't quite have everything she will need, but I am probably pretty close!

Updates

2007-11-06T11:43:00.000-08:00

Many people who love us and care about us, have been asking about updates. This is the information we have: We will recieve updates about our file every 1-2 weeks. CAFAC will let us know when we reach a major milestone in the process, but for the nitty gritty details, we just have to trust that they are doing their job and that things are being processed as quickly as possible. In terms of updates on how our daughter is doing, we may recieve one (possibly two) updates during our wait. These will typically come at three month intervals. Some of you have asked me for pictures etc or why I have not posted pictures on the blog or somewhere else. We will not be doing this both out of respect for our daughters privacy and out of respect for the Ethiopian authorities that ask that this not happen. Please keep in mind that officially, she is not yet a part of our family. Today, we got an update from CAFAC that basically said that documents are being put together to begin the process. Essentially, stuff is happening but no milestones (such as a court date) have been reached... and so we wait. Since I have started work life for us has become insanely busy. The boys are handling the transition quite well... probably better than we are. Jeremy and I feel like we work 7 days a week between actual paid work, our Uganda project, renovations and parenting. Already we are dying for reprieve. We struggle through and are barely holding it together knowing that it is only for a designated amount of time. I miss my family though. I miss my sons and I miss my husband and I miss my friends. Stuff falls through the cracks, stuff that never used to and it bugs me. I get dizzy just watching us. Sigh. I try to spend time every day looking at our baby's picture to remind myself why we are doing what we are doing.

Acceptance Papers

2007-10-23T22:13:00.000-07:00

Today we signed our acceptance papers for our child proposal. We also got the immigration ball rolling again. Wheh what a process. I am told that our part is minor compared to what has to be done in Ethiopia. Apparently it is a big job running from this office to that office, having this paper stamped and then that one etc etc. We are truly grateful to have someone on reliable on the ground to wade through all the red tape for us. I have been doing a bit of research into the Kembata Region (where our daughter was born). There is not a ton of information out there, but from what I understand it is very remote. It is one of the regions of Ethiopia that relies heavily on Entebe (false banana) and is called the green hunger zone. This is because the land is very lush, but there is still abject poverty and a lot of hunger. The area is very densely populated and the land gets divided among sons. Generations and generations of farmers dividing their land has lead to very little land for each family. Consequently, the land has been severely degraded because of over-farming. Entebe is a crop that takes around five years to fully mature. After it has matured, it has to be processed in back-breaking labour before it can be consumed.... its now bedtime for us working folk (yes I started work), so I will post more later

A Proposal

2007-10-18T20:27:00.000-07:00

TODAY WE RECEIVED OUR PROPOSAL!! That's right. We have a very special little girl coming to us. She is 5 months old today! Her birthday is May 18th. She weights approx 15 lbs and she is in good health. She is absolutely gorgeous :-). Now the real wait begins. We still have to wait for immigration and for the Ethiopian courts to legalize the adoption. We have been told that this process takes between 4 and 9 months. Jeremy took the afternoon off from work and we took the boys out for ice cream even though it was raining. I don't think it has really sunk in for them yet. Tomorrow or the day after, Jeremy and I will go out for Ethiopian food to celebrate. A couple of days ago my sister in law asked me what I wanted for my birthday (which is coming on the twentieth) and I told her that all I really wanted was our child proposal. I knew was going to be soon, but I didn't really think that it would actually come in time for my birthday. Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear me... Yeah... I'm just a little giddy. Sorry for the super giant font... can you tell I'm a little excited?

Time for a New Picture

2007-10-11T13:16:00.000-07:00

Looking at the picture on the Blog, I realized how much the boys have grown in the past year. We took a new picture... actually we took about 50 new pictures... and this was the best of the bunch. Apparently the boys have gotten a lot more wiggly in the past year as well. It was thanksgiving... I thought turkey was supposed to make you sleepy???

We're Next

2007-10-09T12:49:00.000-07:00

We got a note from CAFAC today. Apparently we are next in line to receive an infant girl proposal! This is good news for thanksgiving. We still don't know how long this is going to take, but it should be soon. So you can expect to get an excited phone call from me sometime soon! I also found out that I will start my job on the 22nd of this month, I am going in to sign the contract today. We spent Thanksgiving at Auntie Sylvia's this year. We feasted on turkey with friends and family and had lots of time to reflect on how lucky we are. This friday, at Saanich Baptist we are having a"sharing the bounty" event for women. We will be putting together toiletry bags for women in need in the local area. We are also collecting supplies for me to take as an orphanage donation in Ethiopia. I will be giving a quick talk about it (5 minutes or so). We would love to have you out! It takes place at SBC, from 7-9 on October 12th. Bring some sample size toiletries and/or some orphanage donations (if you forget what we need, see my earlier posts). The more the merrier.

The Fourteenth Month of Waiting

2007-10-03T12:38:00.000-07:00

October 1st marked our entrance into the fourteenth month of waiting. I am hoping that with the Ethiopian New Year behind us, there will be some action... soon! We received our second round of shots. We also have confirmed what we suspected; they are not covered by extended medical.... ouch.

Happy New Year!

2007-09-12T12:06:00.000-07:00

Ethiopia has entered the third millenium! Yesterday, the Ethiopian calendar (7.5 years behind our calendar) turned over from 1999 to 2000. The Guardian did a very good article with an audio slide show showing people in London and in Addis celebrating. http://www.guardian.co.uk/international/story/0,,2167505,00.html?gusrc=rss&feed=travel Because of the celebrations the Ethiopian courts will be closed for the remainder of the month. I had previously thought that this may adversely affect our process, but the CAFAC staff disagree. In an email update yesterday we were told, "Despite court closures- it is still the response time by Nairobi Kenya’s CDN IMM office that decided when a family can travel. So for those of you worried about the closure affecting child proposals or travel times if you have an adoption in process, please be assured this will not likely impact you." There was also information regarding wait times. Currently the wait time for infant girls is 14 months. Originally, we had expected to have a child proposal this month, but after calling the staff yesterday, it sounds as though we won't hear anything now until October. This is due in part to the New Year celebrations etc. I do know for sure that families whose paperwork arrived in August have begun to get proposals. That means that there are only 4 or 5 more families ahead of us. We are trying very hard to be patient. The staff at CAFAC, have been wonderful and we have been assured that we are in the home stretch of our wait. Yesterday's email also had some very good explanations as to why the wait is so long. I have included it below. "Sometimes there is a misconception that there are millions of children that are orphaned or in trouble so it should be an instant process to receive a proposal. As has been the case for several years with many country programs - at the time a family applies for a child under 12 months of age, their child is not yet born. The child they will eventually be matched to is not part of the statistics that are given by World Health Organization, Unicef, etc.

The infant under 12 months of age not being born yet is the case for most families when they send their paperwork to Ethiopia. Most matches to our families in this age range are 1-4 months of age when proposed. A sequence of events must occur in the child’s life before they can be placed for adoption: birth- loss of birth family through abandonment/death of birth family - legal process to be declared available for adoption - matches to specific agency and family. While there are millions of children in crisis and orphaned all over the world- these children that exist now are not all available for adoption, and are almost always school aged.

In context of USA agencies that are similar to CAFAC in length of time with a program in Ethiopia, and with more than 60 families coming home each year- web site information on wait times for Adoption Advocates International, Wide Horizons, Children’s Home Society, and Spence Chapin, - are given as 5 months to one year, and appear to be the normal wait times for proposals of infants under the age of 2 years old for agencies who are not new in Ethiopia.

At present: CAFAC proposals for infants up to 18 months of age are taking from 10 – 14 months to be made. The difference in time seems to be a reflection of how many CAFAC applications in any given month were received in Ethiopia, and as the order documents arrive to Ethiopia is followed in the issuance of proposals, this impacts the time frame for any one family’s proposal. Infant proposals seem to be the ones that present the longest wait times- and we empathize with the struggle waiting families have as time goes by and they do not have a match yet.

With Ethiopia ‘s program as each family waits for their match there will also be the usual issues with children who do not pass health screenings, or lab testing to be matched to a waiting family, and must be refused adoption placement altogether, and other issues which might mean they cannot be matched to CAFAC families.

Our next largest group of match requests are for families who want siblings under 36 months of age. The wait time for many of these families also fluctuates- between 8 – 13 months as well. Keeping in mind that siblings must be born in this time frame, PLUS have been kept together by their family of origin, have losses within their birth family that bring the child into care, it is more easy to understand waits for matches. Relinquishment for adoption is still viewed as a last option, after all other options have been considered, by all those involved with any child’s case.

Other match requests for preschool aged children, or older siblings are usually met in under 12 months - and often we have more children from

4-10 years of age offered then we have applications for. Families approved for older children are finding that they get proposals in 2-8 months.

We have been pleased to see that many families’ response to slower time frames have allowed them to consider opening up their age ranges through a simple addendum process, so they can be considered for infants/ children who are older. For the children who are or will be matched after this change, this decision means the world to them. "

Part way through our process, we considered changing our age range. However, in the end we felt that it was important not to alter the birth order of our children, by inserting a sister before one of the boys. All along, they have been told they are getting a baby sister... to suddenly have a big sister would be a really big adjustment for them (not to mention us!).

PS For those of you following the renovation saga, the tile on the tub is up but not grouted. The drywall needs one more coat and sadly we still have no sink or flooring. The big thing for me will be to be able to shower again! Hopefully that will transpire this weekend. Oh yeah, we still have to frame in a closet, so I guess we are not really close to being done with the drywall. The upside to this reno is all the "character" Jeremy and I have been developing. I'm going to eventually post before and after pictures... we just have to get to the after part...

The one year mark and a van.

2007-09-04T10:46:00.000-07:00

Good news and bad news. I always like to hear the good first so hear it is. My Oma and Opa have given us a VAN!!!!!!!! We are so thankful because getting a van has been a major stressor for us. Our little honda is wonderful and we love it but there is no way of fitting three carseats in it. Kids are required to be in booster seats so long now that we really don't have another choice. Oma and Opa are getting a new van, so we can go pick up their old one after September 10th. The only trouble is figuring out how to get it from Calgary to Victoria... That however is a managable problem! What an answer to prayer. The bad news isn't really bad news. Its just that September 1st marked the one year mark for us waiting. Our paperwork arrived in Addis a whole year ago. Saturday was a sucky day for me. Currently the wait for baby girls is 13 months so it *should* be this month that we get a proposal. We'll see.

A shot in the arm, and one in the pocketbook

2007-08-29T11:56:00.000-07:00

Last night Jeremy and I got the first installment of our shots. We have two more trips to make to the travel clinic before we are through. Last night we had three shots each. Next time, we will get two and the last trip will just be for dukoral... thankfully a drink not a shot. We still have to decide if we are going to travel outside of Addis, if we do, we need to take malarial prevention [sigh]. All in all these immunizations cost a whopping $1000. Yikes. We are still hoping our extended medical will cover most of it. The bathroom reno is slowly crawling forward. Toilet and bath are both functional. The drywall is partially up. We are hoping to have tile on the shower over the long weekend! Yeah for showers! Then we just have to frame in the closet, finish the drywall, mud the drywall, prime and paint, install the sink, tile the floor, put the door back up, and put up and paint the trim. Unfortunately, the only time we have to work on it is between the kids going to bed and our tenant going to bed (The bathroom is located right over her bedroom so we are trying to be respectful and not work too early or too late). Speaking of work, it looks like I am going to be looking for a job. With the bathroom reno costs and the unexpected sewer problems we had earlier this year, coupled with the remaining adoption costs, we are unable to keep ahead of the game on one income. So, Ryan is going to school, Paul is going to preschool and Mommy is heading back to work. I have just begun the process of looking but I'll keep you updated. It's heart breaking for me, to think about leaving the boys all day, but I am trying to keep a positive attitude about it. Not very many people are as lucky as I am to be able to be home with the children as long as I have. It's also not forever. Short term pain for long term gain right? Hopefully when the adoption is complete, both Jeremy and I will be able to take some parental leave, and we will all be able to be together while we learn how to be a family of 5 together.

Ryan is 5!

2007-08-22T11:52:00.000-07:00

Its hard to believe but it is true. My oldest baby is FIVE years old today. He is going to kindergarten in a couple of weeks. I know it is cliche but time really does fly. We have probably hit the 1/4 mark for the time that we will have that sweet boy in our home [trying not to cry now]. We have a tradition in our family, when the birthday kid wakes up, they crawl into bed with us and we tell them the story of the day they were born. This morning I was thinking about our baby girl... and what we will have to do to modify that tradition for her. We are coming up on the one year mark since our paperwork was recieved in Addis... September 1st. I called the adoption agency this morning to find out if there has been any movement on our file. There are still a couple of outstanding placements to make for families from July... sigh. She said it could be any day now, or it could take another couple of months. In other news, we ripped apart our bathroom. Yup its gutted... completely and utterly. We have finished re plumbing all the fixtures. The toilet is back in (huge relief). The bathtub is installed but not tiled (no showers) and the sink still remains elusive. This whole process was a MUCH bigger undertaking than either of us thought. We thought we would be a couple of days without the bathroom and everything would be back to normal. HA HA HA. My mom has been gracious enough to let us stay with her for the last TWO WEEKS (thanks mom) Not only has it been a more intensive project than we originally anticipated, it has been much MUCH more expensive... and then there was the flooding incident... which we are still too close to to laugh about. Ask us in a couple of weeks about the river we created flowing down our tenants bedroom walls... Anyway, I think this process has just sealed the deal for me having to look for full time work. With any luck, I will find a job and work until the baby arrives. Then perhaps we can all take some time off together as a family and just BE. Until then, it will be a fine balancing act. Be patient with us. Soon we will emerge from the bathroom victorious and I will have more time to post blog updates!

An Update

2007-07-26T08:24:00.000-07:00

I called CAFAC this morning for my monthly update (I know that if there was any big news they would call me, but phoning once a month is an uncontrollable compulsion). I feel like a bit of a broken record, but for those who don't know this is the way it works: For infant girls (which have the longest wait times), there is a backlog of requests for proposals. Families whose paperwork arrived in Ethiopia at the end of last July are now receiving proposals. Our paperwork arrived on September 1st 2006, so have to wait for the remaining few proposals in July, all the ones in August and then it is our turn. There is no real formula. Sometimes the proposals trickle in slowly, sometimes they arrive in large groups. But since it is now July and they are working on the July proposals from last year (still), we are not expecting one until at least September. I did ask a few other questions though. I wanted to know if the wait time following the proposal was still 4-6 months. I was told that yes, we should count on six months and if it happens sooner to view it as a bonus. As hard as our current wait is, the wait after we receive our proposal is going to be MUCH harder. Then we will have a picture, some information, a real little person waiting for us. Some families are able to travel in only three months, but for this to happen, everything must go exactly as it should which means a minimum number of court dates, for all the immigration processes to go smoothly etc. I am not really anticipating that this will happen for us. Every year, Ethiopian courts close for the summer, this year they are also closing for September to celebrate the new millennium (The Ethiopian calendar is different, currently it is 1999). I assume that this will mean a backlog for the court system. I wanted to know if we would know when our court dates etc are, or if we would just be waiting blindly. I was told, that as much information as CAFAC has, we will have also. Sometimes they do not know until after the fact, but they will keep us informed as much as they can. I also asked how much notice we will have before we travel. I was told that we can anticipate a minimum of three weeks notice. Most families have a month to prepare. This is good as Jeremy has to take time off from work and we have to arrange for Ryan and Paul. Not to mention the price of airfare! I'm hoping that there is only going to be a couple more times I have to call for a monthly update...

Adoption: Made Possible Only Through Loss

2007-07-19T08:37:00.001-07:00

Adoption, by definition is a relationship that can only be formed after a tremendous loss. Before she comes home to us, our daughter will have lost her entire family. In all likelihood, she will have to struggle for survival in less than ideal orphanage conditions. Following that, she will spend time (between 4 and 9 months) in the CAFAC foster home. This is better care than an orphanage could provide, but it is still institutional care. When we bring her home to Canada, she will loose everyone she has any connection with. She will loose her country. She will loose access to anyone who can speak to her in Amharic. Everything will smell, taste and look different. She will also be jet lagged and will have to re-align her biological clock with a new time zone. When she comes to us, she will be in shock, having suffered more losses in her little life than most of us will experience in our entire lifetime and she will not have the language or emotional maturity to express herself. I have asked myself many times whether this is fair. Whether it is ok. Whether adoption is ethical. Adoption nay-sayers claim that it is not. They say that it is wrong to rob a child of his or her cultural heritage, to remove children from their homeland. The answer I have come up with is this. No, it is not fair. In an ideal world, all families would be able to stay together, and children would be raised by their biological parents. In an ideal world, parents would not die of AIDS, children would not suffer from malnutrition and mothers would not have to make the impossible choice of abandoning one baby with the hopes that she will be able to feed the others. But the world is far from ideal, and in this broken, troubled world, an inter-racial family halfway across the world is better than none at all. We cannot do anything about our daughter’s losses, except to hold her, cry with her, help her heal, and help her learn to trust us. No, we cannot give her roots, but I hope someday, we will give her wings.

The Least You Need To Know About Ethiopia

2007-07-18T12:04:00.000-07:00

Ethiopia is located on the horn of Africa. It has been land locked since Eritrea gained independence in 1993 (after a long bloody war). Ethiopia is culturally diverse. It’s 75 million people are divided among over 80 different ethnic groups, although most belong to either the Oromo, Amhara, Tigray or Somali groups. The official language is Amharic, but there are over 84 other languages spoken. Secondary school is taught in English. Ethiopia is one of the oldest nations in the world. Lucy was discovered in Ethiopia and since then it has been referred to as “the cradle of humanity”. Ethiopia also has the distinction of being the only African nation to never be colonized, although it was briefly occupied during the second world war. Ethiopia’s capital is Addis Ababa, which means “new flower”. Before then, the capital was moved whenever the region ran out of wood for fuel. Since the introduction of the fast growing Eucalyptus, the capital has not needed to move. Addis Ababa, is home to Africa’s largest open air market. Hopefully we will get to go shopping during our trip! Historically, Ethiopia was ruled by an Emperor (purportedly a decendant of Soloman and the Queen of Sheba). A coup in the 70’s overthrew Haile Selassie and a communist dictatorship ruled. Ethiopia held its first democratic election in the early 1990’s, though the international community is divided on how democratic recent elections have actually been. Ethiopia has three distinct climatic regions determined mainly by elevation. The coolest zone: above 2,400 m where temperatures range from near freezing to 16 °C; the temperate zone at elevations of 1,500 to 2,400 meters (4,900–7,900 ft) with temperatures from 16 to 30 °C; and the hot zone below 1,500 meters (4,900 ft) with both tropical and arid conditions and daytime temperatures ranging from 27 to 50 °C. Addis Ababa is located in the temperate zone. The topography of Ethiopia ranges from several very high mountain ranges (the Semien Mountians and the Bale Mountains), to one of the lowest areas of land in Africa, the Danakil depression. The normal rainy season is from mid-June to mid-September (longer in the southern highlands) preceded by intermittent showers from February or March; the remainder of the year is generally dry. Ethiopia uses the Ge’ez calendar. The calendar is divided into 12 months of 30 days each. The current year in Ethiopia is 1999. The new year usually falls on September 11th, so this September will mark the beginning of a new millennium in Ethiopia! The main religion in Ethiopia is Christianity, with most of those falling into the Ethiopian Orthodox Church. There is also a large muslim population. Judaism and Animism are also practiced. Ethiopia’s economy is based largely on agriculture. The biggest export crop is… you guessed it… coffee. Fifty percent of the population lives below the poverty line. Becoming landlocked with the loss of Eritrea and lack of infrasturcture (only 15% of roads are paved) make trade difficult. The following statistics are from UNICEF: Ethiopia has 4 800 000 orphans ranging in age from 0-17. The average life expectancy is 48. The GNI per capita is $160 USD. 23% of the population lives on less than a dollar a day. 33% of exports are used to service debt. Female genital mutilation has a prevalence of between 69 and 76%. 43% of children (age 5-14) are involved in child labour. Only 22% of the population has access to improved drinking water. 38% of children under 5 are moderately to severely underweight. 47% of children under 5 suffer from moderate to severe growth stunting. I would like to credit all the sources for this information… but I can’t. I have learned so much about Ethiopia in the past year that I can’t keep track of where it has all come from. Having said that, I have copied parts from Wikipedia (mostly the bit about climate) and UNICEF. Hopefully you have learned something about a country that I have never visited, but where part of my heart resides.

An Event

2007-07-18T07:32:00.000-07:00

Orphanage Donations

When we travel to Ethiopia, we are hoping to take a suitcase full of donations for orphanages. One of the things on the list of needed items is blankets for cribs and twin beds. With that in mind, I am going to host an old fashioned quilting bee. Before you stop reading because you think you can't sew, come anyway. There are lots of jobs for people who think they can't sew too. If you have fabric (either cotton or flannel), that would be very much appreciated. I haven't set a date yet, because I'd really like to find a time that works for the majority of people. I was thinking sometime in early august? You will have to ignore the state of my house (yes we are still under renovation... sigh). Email me to let me know if you are interested and if you think you can spare some time.

For those of you who can't see yourself participating, but would still like to contribute, I have included a list of other things that we are told are needed. The items need to be new. If you are considering donating one of the bulkier items, talk to us first because we only have so much space!

Orphanage Donations Needed Cloth diapers Disposable diapers Crib mattress covers Baby duvet blanket covers Nipples /bottles Fitted crib sheets Cloth crib quilts (not knitted) Scabies/lice remedies- creams and shampoos Hydrocortizone crème and “Peneten” Diaper Rash ointment Zincofax Ointment for Diaper rash Shoes for kids up to age 6 years. Clothes for children up to 10 years of age Socks (all sizes) Hair elastics/ pik combs/ hair clips/pony tail holders/hair brushes Collapsible play pens Twin bed sheets Twin bed quilts Giant Lego blocks/ dump trucks/dolls Towels, face cloths, tea towels, wash cloths Medicines If you are bringing in cash donations these could help to purchase one or more of these items: mesh for the staircase and observatory from the second floor. change tables for baby and toddler rooms cupboards and shelving for all children's rooms Filing cabinet or something for files at clinic playpens at least 6 - nylon so can be wiped down easily. Garbage cans for all rooms and bathrooms Laundry baskets for all rooms Cleaning supply room with locked cabinet A generous supply of buckets, mops etc for cleaning staff. . 6 excersausers for toddlers highchairs- 6 at least. Toy box and toys for each room and outside Decorations for rooms- ie alphabet, pictures Bulletin boards of pictures of families in living room Baby scale for clinic possibly a small 'tub" for every child to have under their bed for their clothes etc. CHOIR PROJECTS:

all school supplies, Crayons, coloring books, pencils, erasers, pens Art Supplies Sports equipment –like soccer balls, footballs, volleyballs, Skipping ropes, and other children’s games Stickers, beading projects, Clothing for kids from size 3 – 14 Shoes for ages 3 years old to 16 years old

Why Does It Cost So Much?

2007-07-08T13:44:00.002-07:00

By the time everything is said and done we will have spent a small fortune (to us) on our adoption. We have had many people ask us why it costs so much so here it is: A breakdown of expenses:

$350-- Choices Registration Fee

$3210-- Home Study. This is money paid to a social worker to evaluate the appropriateness of our home and family. $250-- Home Study Update. We had to complete this because we have moved and because there has been no action on our file for a year. $1200-- Choices Planning and Pre-Placement Fee. $2775-- Choices Placement and Post Placement Fee. $375 -- CAFAC enrollment fee

$1765-- CAFAC Prep/Administrative Fee (preparation of documents for the granting of adoption order in Ethiopia)

$1284-- Child Referral Administration Fee (preparation of child referral, arranging translation of child information, commuications with provincial and CDN immigration authorities for processing child acceptance, final adoption order, first post placement report etc)

$267.50-- Educational Component (workbook that we were required to read, fill out and send back to CAFAC)

$5500 (USD)-- Country Fee (foreign courier fees, embassy authenticatins, foreign phone share, country maintenance fee, travel assistant fee, orphanage donation, adoption specific fee, representative fees, immigration medical and lab tests, child referral fee, airport taxes)

$150 Canadian Immigration Fees

$200-- Entry Visas

$6000- $8000-- Airfare for two adults return, plus one infant one way.

$1000 -- Accomodation for 10 days in Ethiopia

$400-- Immunizations

$100-- cost of wiring money to Ethiopia

All of this adds up to just under $27 000. Not to mention any money we will spend beyond the bare necesities while in Ethiopia. You will note that we cannot afford to take the boys. However, we feel that it is really important that both Jeremy and I be in Ethiopia to take custody of the baby, as it is an experience we will have a chance at just once in our lifetime.

All of the fees and expenses represent real costs. No one makes money on adoption... it is illegal to do so. This is just what it costs. Is it worth it? Absolutely. It is just a simple matter of priorities.

People tell us all the time that they could "Never" afford international adoption but think nothing of financing a 20 -30 thousand dollar car, or spending $5 on a cup of coffee day in and day out and dining out regularily, or sending their children to private school, or taking their kids on expensive trips. There is nothing wrong with any of these things, I am not suggesting there is, but we all have to make choices.

When you put things in perspective, it really doesn't cost that much. How much would you be willing to pay if one of your children was halfway across the world, badly needing your love and attention? Our lives will be forever enriched by the love and affection we will be able to pour into all three of our children. You can't put a price on that.

Passport...

2007-07-08T10:34:00.000-07:00

Wheh. My passport finally arrived. I sent away for it by mail in February and just recieved it now in July. I chose to mail it because I do not have an entire day to stand in line at the passport office. Friends of ours that needed their passports sooner have stories ranging from standing in line for 8 hours only to have the doors close one person ahead of them, to "buying" a spot near the front of the line from entrepreneur/homeless people who charge anywhere from 20 - 50 dollars to spend the night in the line up for you (you still have to wait several hours yourself). For those who don't know, the lineups are as a result of the new border crossing rules that came into effect this year. The rules on how your picture must look are getting silly also. I have a friend who needed a passport for their infant. They had the picture rejected 3 times because the infant was required to be sitting up on its own, have her eyes open and her mouth closed. You try to get a one month old to do that!

The one downside to having mailed my application in, is that my original birth certificate and marriage certificate came back to me FOLDED. As I understand it, folding or laminating, tearing etc, constitutes altering and makes the certificates void... grr. Even if it they are still valid, its annoying as I paid around 200 for new full size birt certificates for all of us, plus a marriage cerificate for Jeremy and I (this was a requirement for our adoption). Anyway... its done and I have a shiny new passport ready to be stamped in Ethiopia... now onto immunizations.

ps. I do appreciate my Canadian passport. Canadian citizens travel around the world more freely than virtually any other nationality. When we come home with our daughter via Germany, she will still have Ethiopian citizenship. Because she is Ethiopian, not only will we be confined to the airport, we will be confined to a certain section of the airport. As Canadians, this restriction does not apply to Jeremy or I.

Why Adoption? Why Ethiopia?

2007-07-05T10:27:00.000-07:00

Some Background… My first memory of anything on TV is of watching the 1980’s famine in Ethiopia on the evening news with my parents when I was four years old. I can still bring to mind those images. Since that time, I have had a fascination with Africa. Growing up, my parents carefully nurtured a social conscience in all of us. We were always provided with opportunities to “do good” both locally and globally. We were constantly challenged to think about what kind of people we wanted to be and how we wanted to impact the world around us. When I was 16, my dad took me on a month long business trip to India. On that trip I saw opulence and poverty together in strange juxtaposition. I also witnessed the incredible, tenacious human spirit. The trip cemented in my mind and heart, a need to act. I believe that as one of the ten percent that holds ninety percent of the wealth in the world, I have an incredible responsibility and that responsibility is to share. I am not exactly sure when the idea of adoption grew on me, it was a really natural evolution that eventually grew and blossomed into one of my greatest desires. Fortunately, I am married to a man who responds to and delights in my dreams and ambitions. Like most couples, before we were married Jeremy and I discussed children. Our conversation was a little different from most couples though… in addition to discussing how many children we would have, we also discussed what the source of those kids would be. I wanted to adopt, which Jeremy was more than happy to do, but he also wanted to attempt biological children. So for us, adoption has never been a second choice which is something that I hope our daughter always realizes. Ryan was born a year after we were married and twenty five months later, Paul. When I was pregnant with Paul, we began investigating adoption. I knew from the beginning that I wanted to adopt from somewhere in Africa, so I began the research. I was appalled to discover that there was only one adoption agency in all of Canada (now there are two) that had any experience facilitating adoptions from Africa, and that they really only worked with Ethiopia. I had just assumed that with all the need in that part of the world, it would be quite commonplace. Afterall, the UN estimates that there are over 12 million AIDS orphans living in sub Sahara Africa. But unless we wanted to attempt to wade our way through government red tape on our own, Ethiopia was really our only choice. We have never regretted our choice, but are saddened that there are not more opportunities for children in other countries to find “forever families” in Canada. We were encouraged by the adoption agency to wait until after Paul was born to pursue adoption. We waited till Paul was one to begin, mostly because we did not want him to feel displaced by the new baby. The day we filed our application, was like both days we found out we were expecting the boys! We were so excited about the prospect of adding to our family. So that’s basically it… how we came to be expecting from Ethiopia.

PROCESS PROCESS PROCESS

2007-07-02T08:51:00.000-07:00

We have had a number of people ask us what steps are involved in international adoption and where we are in those steps. We thought it might be helpful to describe the process for readers of Krahnicles as well.

Overview of Steps for Ethiopian Adoptions to Canada

1) Register with CAFAC and request an introductory package. CAFAC is the adoption agency located in Manitoba that facilitates Ethiopian adoptions. When we began, there was only one Canadian adoption agency that could facilitate adoptions from Africa, now there is also one in Ontario.

2) Register with Choices adoption agency. We needed an adoption agency within our province to complete a home study and meet the provincial requirements for approval.

3)Complete education component. We had to satisfy an education component for both agencies which consisted of a massive amount of reading and some homework. Had we lived in Manitoba, CAFAC would have required that we attend some seminars.

4) Complete Home Study. This consisted of quite a number of interviews (5-6 is average I think) with a registered social worker. The social worker came to our home, met the boys and asked a TON of questions. Main topics include family history, personal values, and parenting strategies and philosophy. While many people find the home study intrusive and onerous, we didn’t really. We have heard of other families being put through the mill and their homes gone over with a fine tooth comb, but this wasn’t really our experience. Our social worker was flexible and easy to work with. The home study interviews are conducted over a minimum of three months.

5) Prepare Dossier. The dossier consists of the home study plus other documentation that we had to gather up while we were doing the home study. The information includes: power of attorney letter, letter of intent to adopt, agency approval letter, home study, certificate of training, photographs of applicants, original birth certificates for the entire family, original marriage certificate, criminal record checks, medical reports, statement of net worth, letter of employment, post placement report agreement, and photographs of our home and family. We sent the package to CAFAC who had it notarized and sent to Ethiopia. The paperwork must be legalized by foreign affairs and authenticated by the embassy. The package was received in Addis Ababa, translated and certified September 1st 2006.

6) Immigration Paperwork. After sending our dossier on, we had to begin the first of our immigration paperwork. You can only go so far with this though until you have a proposal for a specific child.

7)Waiting for a Child Proposal. That one little sentence seems like it wouldn’t be a big deal at all… however this is where we are stalled. We began the adoption process in February 2006, flew through the paperwork and have been waiting the last ten months for a proposal. Right now applicants whose paperwork arrived in July 2006 are receiving proposals, so our turn is coming (our papers arrived Sept 1 2006) but it has been ten long months. When we began our adoption, proposals for infant girls were being received much more quickly (6-9 months). Currently, the estimate is about a year for infant girls. Boys, sibling groups and older children take much less time (3-6 months). In another blog entry I intend to explain the reasons (as I understand them) why it takes so long.

8)Travel Preparation. We have to get our passports updated (I am still waiting for mine to come in the mail… I sent it in February and I still haven’t got it), get immunizations and eventually travel visas. For us the biggest travel preparation we are completing is saving the money to go. For both of us to go, it will cost between 6 and 8 thousand dollars. The boys will stay with my parents because we simply cannot afford to bring them.

9) Child proposal. We will eventually receive a proposal for a child that will include photos, a medical report and any known social history. Based on this information we will say Yes or No to the proposed adoption. If we say yes, we will have to submit a formal acceptance letter.

10) Finalization of Adoption. Once we have accepted the child, an immigration medical exam must be completed. The adoption will be completed on our behalf in the Ethiopian courts by a representative appointed by the adoption agency. Once this is complete, we have to wait for Canadian immigration to issue a visa so we can bring our baby home. This process takes between four and nine months.

11) Travel to Ethiopia. This trip is between 10 and 14 days. We will meet our daughter the first day after we arrive and the day after that, we will receive full custody. The remainder of the trip is all about getting used to each other, acclimatizing and getting ready to be a family together as well as collecting the last of the paperwork. Hopefully we will be able to take in a little of Ethiopia’s rich culture as well.

12)Home. Once we are home we will have to apply for citizenship, provincial health care and all the other government agencies that need to know about our newest addition. We will also be required to fulfill post placement reports every year until our daughter is 18 years old. This is only our part, I have said nothing of all the behind the scenes stuff from the other side of the equation. In Ethiopia, there are over 40 steps each child must go through before they can be released for adoption. As you can see, both governments and our agency are very careful. It is really easy to get frustrated with all the red tape and what seems like an overly onerous process, but in the end, everyone is working on making sure that the kids come first and that their safety and well being is considered before all other things and this IS as it should be.

Home Study Update

2007-06-28T15:11:00.000-07:00

Because we moved and it had been over a year since our first homestudy was completed, we needed to get our homestudy updated (for another $250). This is a requirement of the Canadian government, not the Ethiopian government. I was really not looking forward to this process as we are (still) in the middle of renovating and with school ending and my brother's wedding coming up we have been really busy. It actually proved to be less onerous than I thought it would be with most of it done over the phone. I have been really impressed with our social worker. She is very considerate and seems to care very much for the kids and the family. So wheh. That's done and we shouldn't need another one now unless things drag on for another year... (yes I am feeling pessimistic). I have been spending some time looking for kids books either taking place in Ethiopia, or about Ethiopia. Our local library and bookstores have had little to no selection. So far I have found: A Saint and His Lion (chapters.ca) Daughters of the Ark ((chapters.ca) intended for much older children The Story of Coffee (bought at an Ethiopian restaurant in Vancouver)

If anyone runs across others, let me know.

I also ordered an Amharic phrase book and a book on Ehtiopian history (stay tuned for my reviews).

Below are some amharic words and phrases that I am going to try to master...

Father --Abutfaza Mother --Anutmaza Are you hungry?--Erabish? What do you want?--Mintifaligalish I don’t understand--Algabanim Be careful--Tinkuk Thank you--Amisigenalo Excuse me - sorry--Ekurta Okay--Ishi Don’t do that--Imbe No--Aye Yes--Owe Wait--Coy Go--Mohate Come --Masculine) Na (Feminine) Nay Good-- Turu Enough-- Betkau Tired--Dakomish Sleep time-- Tyna Water-- Waha Milk-- Wattat Food-- Megab Eat-- Be Hot--Mukat Toilet-- Shintibate Urination--Shinti Shoes-- Chama Beautiful--Konjoi Good girl--Turriush Sit Down--Koochby Keep quiet-- Oush Finish-- Charush You want…--Tufaligalish Home--Abait

When will our proposal come?

2007-06-14T21:46:00.000-07:00

The short answer is, we don’t know. It could be tomorrow (unlikely) or it could be another several months. We are praying that it will be this summer sometime. After that we have to wait between 4 and 9 months before we are able to travel. We are discouraged as the timeline seems to be extending out and out further. I allow myself to contact the adoption agency once a month to ask about progress (even though I know that they would call if there was news). When I called at the end of May, there were several proposals for baby girls to go in July still and several more in August… then us. This leaves me second guessing our choice for a girl. If we had been indifferent about sex we might already have a little boy home… Adoption is an interesting process emotionally. I go through periods where I think of little else, and I spend copious amounts of time (that I don’t have), on the internet, researching adoption, Ethiopian customs and anything else I can get my hands on. I feel very alone during these periods because our friends and family do not have similar experience to draw from and cannot relate. Occasionally, people forget about the adoption because I do not have a growing belly. It is easy to be discouraged and depressed. People that do know and care, have run out of questions to ask us and I get tired of telling people “no news yet”. Last time, I called the adoption agency was a couple of weeks ago. It left me depressed and I thought I would make myself feel better by going to a baby store I had heard about (you know… a little retail therapy). I wandered around the store and left even more frustrated than when I went in. I realized that nothing in the store was really applicable to our situation since in all likelihood our daughter will be over one by the time we finally have her in our arms. I have no idea if I should be setting up a crib or a toddler bed. How are the kids handling it? The boys are frustrated to. Ryan asked me the other day why we couldn’t just buy a plane ticket to go get her. He and Paul pray for her every night. Ryan is the only four years old I know that can pick out Ethiopia on a map. Paul is starting to ask if she will ever come home. Ryan tells me regularly, that he misses his baby sister and he wonders what she is doing. Had we known that the process would be this long, I don’t think we would have told them right away. Ah well hindsight is 20/20. This winter we had a cool moment with Ryan. He was looking at some mail I had pinned on our bulletin board and was focused on a picture of some people in Darfur sitting under a tarp. He asked me what was going on in the picture and I explained it as best as I could. I explained that the people had had to leave their homes because of war and go to the refugee camp. I explained that they didn’t have shelter and likely very little food or water and that they didn’t have any money to buy the things they need. Ryan asked me to show him where Darfur was on a map. I showed him and he was astonished to see how close it was to Ethiopia. Then my four year old went and dumped out his piggy bank and asked me if I would help him give his money to the people that live there. We made the donation and he had a very satisfied look on his face when he said “Today they won’t be hungry anymore”. Wow. I was so proud of him. --Leah

Adoption process update

2007-04-30T08:59:00.000-07:00

Leah called CAFAC to find out where we were in line. Our file was started in August of 2006. CAFAC is just starting to get proposals for July. What does this mean for us? It means that we probably won't get a proposal for 1 - 2 months at least. With a 3 - 6 month wait after the proposal, we likely won't be able to go to Ethiopia until October, perhaps as late at January 2008. Sigh.

Success...or at least a great afternoon

2007-04-16T09:32:00.000-07:00

Thank you so much to everyone who made it out to the open house. There were a lot of great people, many things to munch on, and a great time had by all. We quite enjoyed showing off 'the potential', catching up with many of you (as much as possible with 50 - 70 people) , and pulling a name out of a hat for the B&B draw. Congratulations to Andrew and Sandell! May you have a wonderful stay. Overall, we sold 80% of the tickets, raising over $800 dollars which brings us quite a bit closer to finish paying for the adoption costs. If you're wondering why it's taken me two weeks to put this post up, we've been pedal to the metal getting our place ready for a renter. We have a few more days left before she moves in, and have a long list of finishing touches to complete. Thank you all again for your support, be it coming to the open house, purchasing tickets, or inquiring about how things are going.

Open House: April 1, 2007

2007-03-20T21:49:00.000-07:00

Set this date in your calendar: Sunday April 1 from 1 PM to 5 PM (or there abouts). You're invited to our open-house. Why? Because we lov...want your mone...want to show our place off. Yeah. That's it. Seriously, though. We would love to have you. Drop me a note at and let me know you're coming. If it's a last minute thing and you find that you don't have access to a email, I'll make an exception for you, especially if you're bringing food :). I just want an idea if I'm ordering just enough California rolls for my family, or for all of Vancouver Island. We're at 2878 Leigh Road in the boom city (19.2% increase in population in last 5 years) of Langford (yes, I'm a geek). If you need directions, check Google Maps. If you need further incentive, remember we'll be doing the draw for one night at Morningside Bed and Breakfast. If you haven't purchased your limited-edition ticket, talk to me, Jeremy. I'm a little behind (1 - 30) in the ticket sales so I need to reach a respectable number :( And money raised through the tickets goes straight into Leah's savings where we pay for adoption costs. Hope to see you all on April Fools Day.

New digs.

2007-03-05T09:59:00.000-08:00

Moving in went as smoothly as could possibly be expected last week. There was a bit of a glitch with the moving truck, but switching the 5-ton for 2 1-ton trucks at Budget for about the same cost didn't set us back at all. It was probably easier. Because Leah had almost all our stuff packed, it was more a question of "How did we collect so much junk...er...stuff?" On Saturday we started 'modifying' a room and learned much about removing lath and plaster. I took a few photos perhaps we'll post them eventually. We are working towards suiting the downstairs into a 2 bedroom 800+ square foot area, which will be a great boon for the mortgage payments and earnings towards more adoption payments and the on-going renovations. Stay tuned for more information...

Leaving comments

2007-03-02T12:25:00.000-08:00

I tweaked the comments so you no longer have to be a user. Some days it may take me a little longer to moderate the comments, though.

Babysitting not included.

2007-02-15T20:35:00.000-08:00

Picture this: Langford, end of March. You are attending a wonderful house-warming party at Jeremy's new bank-owned acquisition and enjoying the awesome company, great snack food, and generally having a pleasant time. Your host announces it's time for the draw! Since you are a great fan of romantic evenings and wanted to support the Krahn's adoption endeavours, you eagerly purchased a ticket prior in the hopes that you and your significant other can spend a night at the spectacular Morningside Bed and Breakfast.

How does the story end? How does it start? It starts by you talking to Jeremy. How it ends, nobody knows.

I don't quite have a date in mind yet. For that matter, we haven't even moved in yet. I'm just looking for a good excuse to have you all over.

If you're reading this, you are invited. The fine print: We're trying to raise a little more money for the adoption. We have another $10K or so to go, with $3000 in fees, and the remainder in airfare. The draw is one way of doing this. Only 50 tickets will be sold. Get them in advance for $20 a piece. The one night stay at Morningside will have to be in the off-season (check their website for more details) as the summer is completely booked. Breakfast will be served by yours-truely. That alone is worth the price of the ticket :).

Updates and apologies for no updates

2007-02-15T19:58:00.000-08:00

OK, I admit it. I'm no 'l33t' blogger. There you have it. It's in bits and bytes for all you to wisely nod your head to. This is long overdue. I know. Get over it. So, what's happened since May of 2006? Where shall I start...probably June 2006. So the Garage Sale went fairly well. We should have advertised better, hopefully that's a lesson I'll remember. We raised $160 or so and are now proud owners of 2 lawnmowers. My dear bass amp went to a new home. Sniff. Time for another Garage Sale, perhaps later this summer, but that'll be another story. We still don't have our little girl, or even a proposal. Sigh. Perhaps late summer or fall of this year we'll have one or both. This means that there are some challenges that we have to work through, some of which will be bigger moves, and some which are smaller. First of all, the bigger moves. From Colwood to Langford, from a 1180 sq.ft. half-duplex to a 2000 sq.ft single-family renovation. We completed the sale earlier this month and are moving in on the 28th. That's in less than 2 weeks. Stay tuned for more information. Some of the smaller moves and challenges we can 'enjoy' are finding a way to get a minivan. This may require the trade-in of our Civic which I must say is the best car I've ever had. Don't mind me if I get all sentimental about it. But I'll cross that bridge when I get there. In the mean time, I'll keep driving the Civic, and see about getting the little Geo to unlock on the drivers side and open from the passenger side. Yes, getting in can be a problem. Maybe I can trade the Geo in? Or anybody wanna buy a Geo? We have passports to sort out, which can be interesting. There are also immunizations and other shots, and figuring out how to pay for the remainder of the adoption. Speaking of paying for the adoption, through the very generous donation from many of you, we've raised over $8000. Thank you all so much.

Garage Sale

2006-06-13T21:16:00.000-07:00

So here's a good idea Leah came up with: hold a garage sale and all the money goes into the adoption fund. We get rid of a bunch of stuff we hardly use...except my precious tools...and golf clubs...and fishing rods...and the money is used for a good cause. Fabulous! One thing I've finally decided to get rid of is my bass guitar and amp. Sigh. I will miss them and I really quite enjoy(ed) playing, but with two little boys that insist on "playing along" (i.e. covering the strings) while I play, I've just left the amp in the shed for the last year or so. If you're interested, it's a Crate 15" 100W BX-100. You can check out a review here. It's a sweet sounding thing, but it's time for it to go. I'm thinking $150 for the amp and $100 for the Ibanez Cimar CXB200BX 4-string guitar. Both are in excellent shape, though the guitar could use a new set of strings. Do you have a few items that you would like to get rid of, or perhaps get rid of on behalf of your spouse? Feel free to drop them off or bring them by my desk at Mercurial. Remember, that's getting rid on behalf of your spouse. I did not say get rid of your spouse. Geez, the people I have to put up with :) Oh yeah. We'll be having this garage sale at our place, 3080 Metchosin Road, on Saturday June 24 from 10 - 3 or so.

Feeding the developers

2006-06-06T13:49:00.000-07:00

Leah has been baking cookies for me (Jeremy) to bring into the office and making meals for sale. We're doing this to raise funds for the adoption. It's daunting, sometimes, to look at all the expenses we're going to incur and remain optomistic. The response has been awesome. People seem to love the cookies. And why not? They're got that special ingredient, sugar, that makes them so addictive. I won't tell you what the other addictive ingredient is :) Today we brought in all the fixings for burritos. It was a bit of a slow start but they went fast. One thing that I really enjoy about working here at Merc...the people here are always willing to support others. I know it happens at other companies, but it provides a sense of belonging. In other news, we sent out a note to friends and family asking for support and to 'sponsor a mile' between Victoria, B.C. and Addis Ababa, Ethiopia, a distance of about 9400 miles. Once again, we were blown away by the response. I think we have about 8200 or so of those miles covered! If we have to, we can walk the rest of the way. Trust me though, I would rather not.

2006-05-23T09:29:00.000-07:00

On Friday we got our Provincial Letter of approval!!!! I just have to take some pictures of the house and we will be ready to have all our documents sent off to Manitoba and then onto Adis Ababa!

An Update

2006-05-15T11:18:00.000-07:00

Wow. We are blown away by the generosity of our friends and family. So far we have 1330 km sponsored! That leaves only 8070! Thank you so much to everyone who is helping to make this a reality for us. We are just now finishing up our first round of paperwork for immigration and we are still waiting on the last little bit of paperwork to be completed so we can have our dossier sent off. This step must (of course) be accompanied by a big cheque so we are extra greatful for the donation money that has come in. God is good! An update on the doll situation: I did finally find one on the dusty top shelf of a zellars, I think I found the only one in victoria so if anyone else is looking, you are out of luck! I know this seems like a pretty small issue. Who cares about a doll right? But it is one that has stuck with me a bit. Just one example of how caucasian centered this society is... "I'm only one. But still, I am one.I cannot do everything, but still, I can do something.And because I cannot do everything,I will not refuse to do the something that I can do."-- Edward Everett Hale